by David Wraith
So, how was your month? Mine was interesting. Welcome to the fourth and final post in The Dick Chronicles. Although, SEX+STL co-founder, Anna Bent did suggest making The Dick Chronicles an annual event where I write about my dick exclusively every October. Call it, “Dicktober!”
Before I go any further, I want to thank everyone who commented on the series, here on the blog, on Facebook, Fetlife or in person. Your feedback means a great deal to me. I will point out, for what it’s worth, that the overwhelming majority of responses have come from women. In spite of being an exhibitionist my entire life, publishing writing and photos this candid made me a bit nervous. People coming up and thanking me for my honesty assured me it was worth the risk.
From the initial photo shoot, I was already pushing my limits. I’d never had my erection photographed before and doing so meant having to masturbate in front of the photographer and keep myself erect for the remainder of the shoot. In my adult life, I had never masturbated in front of anyone who wasn’t a lover or a dominatrix.
The irony of a guy writing about erectile dysfunction, having to get hard and stay hard on queue was not lost on me. Suddenly I felt sympathy for all the male porn stars who’ve watched the clock ticking away while an entire film crew was “waiting for wood.”
A couple funny coincidences: First, the night before last week’s entry went live; I had my first solo nude modeling gig for an artists’ group. I had modeled at a couple SEX+STL events, but those were an hour a piece and always with another model. This was three hours and I was alone. Half way through, one of the artists asked to take a close up photo of my dick to use as a reference. The funny thing was, this artist didn’t know jack about me, SEX+STL, or “The Dick Chronicles.” I said yes and the next thing I knew, there was a camera between my knees.
Second, last Monday I attended a talk at Shameless Grounds given by sex positive therapist, Amy Luechtefeld. I asked her if she prescribed drugs to her patients. For the record, I was referring to anti-depressants, but as if she’d read my mind (or my blog posts), she started talking about how erectile dysfunction is often psychological rather than physical and how drugs like Viagra and Cialis are horribly over prescribed. I am now considering therapy.
In the end, if nothing else, this experiment with radical honesty was great for me. Courage is like a muscle, you have to use it to develop it. If you don’t do things that scare you, your courage can atrophy. You can become overly cautious and fearful without even realizing it. Hopefully, I’ve inspired a few people that they can be honest about their bodies, their sex lives and their insecurities, and the world will not end.
Good series, and good message about courage.