Blog

The Play Party’s Second Coming with Nikki Powell

  When we last spoke to Nikki Powell in 2019, she was on the verge of hosting her first public event, The Play Party. Oh, what a difference a year makes. Since our first interview, Nikki has launched a tantra practice, a podcast, and #PussyTrauma, her private, woman only Facebook group, has grown to over […]

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Is Camming the Job For You?

By Metta May [ A guest post by Metta May, founder of Wellness4Hoes and instructor at The Mistress Academy] There’s not really an orientation to attend for this gig, so if you’re new or on the fence, here’s a bit of a glimpse at what you’re getting in to!  Be You! – This is the […]

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The Mistress Academy

By Lady Lovage  The Mistress Academy is a finishing-program in St. Louis aimed at those in the sex work industry who are looking to incorporate BDSM and power exchange aspects into their personal or professional lives.  This program is taught by Lady Lovage, a Dominatrix with seven years of experience both as a lifestyle Femdom […]

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A Conversation with the Ladies of the House of J Femdom Collective

  When I arrive at the downtown St. Louis loft building that houses the Loft of Sin, the home to the House of J Femdom collective, I’m met by a very polite young person who escorts me to the elevator and up to the dungeon. As a submissive, I’m always a little nervous meeting dominants […]

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How to Stop Alienating Women from SEX+STL

[Ed Note: If you receive unwelcome messages from other members of the group, please send them a link to this post, or a link to our SEX+STL Meetup Email policy, which is pinned to the top of our message board. Then, screenshot the offensive message and send to a SEX+STL co-leader so we can have […]

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SEX+STL: The War on Whores with Maggie McNeill

The War on Whores [Free Documentary Screening] Featuring Maggie McNeill Wednesday, May 1, 2019 7:00 PM to 9:00 PM Brown School at Washington University  1 Brookings Dr · St. Louis, MO THIS EVENT IS A VERY SPECIAL OPPORTUNITY. We are SO excited to welcome Maggie McNeill back to St Louis! She was last here in 2014, promoting her book. This […]

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Phallus-Ophy’s Namaste Nikki on Sex Coaching, Phone Sex, and Play Parties

Namaste Nikki is a sex coach, phone sex provider, and, as of this March’s “The Play Party,” a sex-positive party impresario. We here at SEX+STL are always looking for a good party that we don’t have to throw ourselves, so I was very eager to talk to Nikki and learn more about her work and her […]

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Sex-Positive Etiquette for Men: Discussion Recap

On January 27, 2019, we held a Sex-Positive Etiquette for Men discussion at Shameless Grounds. Here’s the event description: This event is free and open to all SEX+STL members. Men – do you wish we had more female members? (Note: as of right now we have more than 4300 members on our Meetup group. I’m […]

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SESTA/FOSTA: The Strangulation of Free Expression & Safe Sex Work

A guest post by Jackie Harris For the last 22 years, freedom of expression online in the US has lived happily within “47 U.S.C., the Communications Decency Act,” a piece of legislation whose original purpose was, as suggested by its name, used to restrict free speech on the internet.  Oddly enough, within this act passed to […]

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Ask SEX+STL: How Do I Find a Woman to Spank Me?

Q: I have been looking long and hard for someone who will spank me. Seriously. Would you know any trust worthy ladies you could tell me about? Or could you point me in the right direction? Thanks so much. A: There are two solutions to your situation. One involves an investment of time, the other an […]

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SEX+STL Meetup Group Email Policy

One of the goals of Sex Positive St. Louis is to connect like-minded, sex-positive people and foster a sex-positive community. That being said, using the SEX+STL Meetup Group for the sending of unsolicited, sexually explicit emails to other group members is inappropriate and will not be tolerated. Doing so is grounds for being banned from the […]

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Dating Safety Review Notes

THANK YOU Shameless Grounds for hosting our event! This talk was about physical, emotional, and financial safety in the realm of dating. Kendra Holliday facilitated. Carla was on hand to speak of her date rape experiences. Therapist Paula LaFond from Women’s Resource Center at YWCA offered her professional experience. Trauma can elicit several reactions: Fight, Flight, […]

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Today I Was Fat

Note: This is reposted with permission from Bitter Blush. It was originally published at Bitter Blush blog, a platform that strives to create an open community to discuss topics that traditionally make us **blushhh. This piece is by Darius M. Today, I needed to get out of bed. Post-graduate life has presented few challenges for me as an […]

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Sex-Positive Christianity

Note: This is reposted with permission from Bitter Blush. It was originally published at Bitter Blush blog, a platform that strives to create an open community to discuss topics that traditionally make us **blushhh. This piece is by Anonymous. The Christian point of view regarding sex is perhaps one of the most “sex-positive” perspectives out […]

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The Naked Truth: SEX+STL Clothing Optional Events

Why Do We Do This? Why throw a clothing optional event? Why attend one? It’s a question a child might ask, but it’s not a childish question. I’ll answer with more questions. Why do we wear costumes on Halloween? Why do we wear black to funerals? Why do some offices require business attire, and why […]

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A Message from the Leaders of Sex Positive St Louis

Sex Positive St. Louis is a non-partisan organization. While we reserve the right to fight for the political causes we believe in, in our six year history we have not seen fit to endorse any particular political candidate or party. That said, in light of our most recent election, we feel the need to publicly […]

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Kinky Flower Arrangements!

UPDATE: Fleus de Lou is now out of business. Fleur de Lou is NOT your average flower and gift shop! Have you visited it? It’s a sweet little local designer boutique, located right under the Tivoli movie theater sign on Delmar in University City, St. Louis MO. Not only do they offer traditional flower bouquets, but […]

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Let’s Talk About Caitlyn Jenner: Part 1 of 2

Every disenfranchised group has to deal with its Fifth Columnists. Black folks have Stacey Dash. The upshot is that Stacey is far from being the most well known black woman in entertainment, journalism or politics among black or white people. Conservative voices among the marginalized are rarely the most prominent voices. More people know Margaret […]

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Let’s Talk About Caitlyn Jenner: Part 2 of 2

This is the second part of a two part conversation. For part one, click here. Dramatist Personae: Jaimie Hileman – Board President of Metro Trans Umbrella Group of Greater St. Louis Joss Barton – Writer and Artist Ruby Threadgill – Radio Personality, founder of Generation Next SEX+STL: Joss, since you’ve watched the show, what is […]

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Urethral Sounding Demo Recap

We offer some amazing events for our local community – not only do we host happy hours, discussions, pussy parties, and clothing optional parties, but we also present demos from time to time. Previous demos include blowjob, cunnilingus, female ejaculation, and fisting. Well the other day, I met a man who loves sounding. Urethral sounding is […]

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Facing Your Fears

A guest post by one of our members: Fear keeps us in chains. Break FREE We all have at one time found ourselves living a fearful life. What do you fear? Fear strangles you. It matters not what that fear is, you can’t relax, it holds you back and robs you of peace of mind. Are you […]

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A Life Less Monogamous, by Cooper Beckett

Our friend Cooper Beckett from Life on the Swingset has a new book out! Here is his announcement: Cooper S. Beckett here from Life on the Swingset! I’m so excited because my first novel has been released! A Life Less Monogamous is the story of newbie swingers entering the big scary sexy lifestyle. You can buy it RIGHT […]

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How to Throw a Penis Party

I’ve spent the last five years throwing all sorts of clothing optional events. And you probably haven’t. I’ve sort of become an accidental expert on the subject, so if you’re in the St. Louis area and are in the market for a clothing optional event planner, I’m your man. If you’re outside the St. Louis […]

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It Worked for Us: Starting a Successful Sex-Positive Group in Your City

Our society is confusing – we’re OBSESSED with sex, but we’re SO AFRAID of it. Just about everything thing you see in the media is ignorance or fear-based. Sex is censored, controlled, sensationalized, misconstrued… no wonder we’re confused! That’s why access to sex-positive education is SO critical. EVERY city should have a sex-positive organization where people […]

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Bringing Sexy Black with Dr. Lexx

Dr. Lexx will be presenting SEX+STL’s Homophobia in Black Culture, Sunday, December 6th, 2015, 2 pm, at Shameless Grounds, co-sponsored by Afrosexology.  For our interview with the founders of Afrosexology, click here.  If you’re attending a presentation by Lexx Brown-James, LMFT, Ph.D., the keyword is “comfort,” as in; wear comfortable clothes, don’t get too comfortable in your chair, […]

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Bringing Sexy Black with Afrosexology

Afrosexology is a co-sponsor of SEX+STL’s Homophobia in Black Culture, with  Dr. Lexx Brown-James, Sunday, December 6th, 2015, 2 pm, at Shameless Grounds. For our interview with Dr. Lexx, click here. The 14th Street Mall in Old North St. Louis is dark and quiet around 6 p.m, the Sunday before Thanksgiving. The only light that’s […]

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SEX+STL: Fifth Anniversary Fleshtivus

  Please read the details in full for instructions on how to RSVP for this event: Peace, Joy, and Love to you all! Our annual clothing optional holiday party, Fleshtivus, is upon us. This year there’s even more reason to celebrate. Come join us for Sex Positive St. Louis’ 5th Year Anniversary! The SEX+STL team […]

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SEX+STL: They Get It!

Feedback from someone who attended our Sex-Positive Etiquette for Men class at Shameless Grounds, Nov 1, 2015: I had the opportunity to sit in on a Sex+Stl event regarding ethical conduct for men. It was the first event sponsored by this organization that I have attended and was conducted at Shameless Grounds in near south […]

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The NEW Rechargeable Magic Wand

As you know, I’m a huge proponent of the Hitachi Magic Wand. I’ve used them for years. I say “them” because I had one for five years, then passed it on to a friend and bought a new one. I also have one at each household – my partner Matthew’s and mine. I use it […]

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On Being Intersex… Or, I Am Not a Unicorn

by Leon Augustus Braxton, Jr. Many do believe that intersex people are like unicorns: a mythical creature that is rarely seen. Like unicorns, intersex has been largely unseen mainly due to the veil of secrecy and shame that intersex people feel. However, unlike the unicorn we are not a myth – we exist. Intersex people are […]

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Safe and Healthy Sex Tips from a Sex Worker!

Last night Kendra Holliday gave a presentation on safe and healthy sex at Hustler. Kendra is Co-Founder of SEX+STL, a mother, a sex worker, and has a healthcare background. She has had hundreds of partners, zero STIs, and loads of fun! In case you missed the presentation, here’s a quick and dirty summary of what was […]

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CFNM Penis Party!

Most of the events hosted by Sex Positive St. Louis are open to all genders. Occasionally, we’ll offer an event for women only. They are ALWAYS wonderful, a great opportunity for women to explore their sexuality safely, in a setting that is comfortable for them. In the spirit of equality, some of our male members requested an event for […]

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A SEX+STL Testimonial from M

M is a woman in her 20’s… I heard that the SEX+STL community was a good, welcoming one, and I caught a glimpse of that warmth at the Topless Tea Party. It’s hard to find a group of women who are truly, truly kind, but everyone was. Really. The veterans were happy to include the […]

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SAR Opportunity in St Louis!

See this flyer for details! Among many other things featured in this enlightening workshop, Kendra and her partner Matthew will be speaking on non-monogamy or sex work or something super provocative! The talk they gave last year was voted most interesting! 2015 SAR Flyer

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A SEX+STL Testimonial from Kate

Kate is a woman in her 50’s… I’ve been a member of SEX+STL for about a year and 1/2 now. I call it Sex Education for adults (which in my opinion is sorely needed these days) and I’m especially impressed with their ongoing fight to promote healthy body image. I’ll never forget my first clothing […]

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A SEX+STL Testimonial from J

J is a woman in her 40’s… The Bare as You Dare event held by SEX+STL has, thus far, been one of the most transformative experiences of my life. Having been raised in an extremely religious family (and taught all of the body shame and sex shame that seems to go along with that), and […]

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Where are the Orgies?

The other day we got this message from someone: “I was just curious if there was anywhere (clubs, private parties, etc.), in which people are there to just enjoy sex. Perhaps orgy style, but more clean and fun. Please email any ideas you may have. Thanks!!” but when we wrote back, the email address was […]

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SEX+STL Presents: A Fistful of Dollars!

Our first ever FISTING DEMO and PLAY PARTY! Friday, June 13, 2014 8pm PT’s in Centreville, IL This is our last event before we take a break for the summer, so get your tickets and watch us go out with a BANG! Activist and Exhibitionist Kendra Holliday of The Beautiful Kind will be taking on […]

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Play Parties: What’s In It For Me?

A guest post by Henry Lee (This article is based on a talk I gave on March 16, 2014 at Shameless Grounds.) So what is a play party? Some people might say it’s just a nice term for an orgy, but it can actually mean a lot of different things. A play party is any […]

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SEX+STL Clothing Optional Bowling Party: Friday, April 18th

Everybody, everybody, get your bowl on! Join us for (what we honestly believe to be) St. Louis’ first ever Clothing Optional Bowling Party. $20 gets you three hours of clothing optional bowling and/or billiards, shoe rental and free food. Cash bar (no outside beverages, please) Catering By Shameless Grounds Music provided by DJ Shawn Gaston […]

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Ad-Liberation! SEX+STL and NARAL present a night of Improv!

Join Sex Positive St. Louis and NARAL: Pro-Choice America for Ad-Liberation! A Night of Improv Comedy featuring Mama’s Pot Roast, Washington University’s Premiere Short Form Improv and Sketch Comedy Group. March 20th at the Ann W. Olin Women’s Building on the Washington University Campus: (Download the map here.)

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Pussy Party 3!

We keep having awesome events in St. Louis! Let me tell you something about hosting edgy, sexually themed events in the Midwest – it’s a little bit frustrating. First of all, you get the idea, or the request from someone in the community. You can’t execute it immediately – you have to plan ahead in […]

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Herpes Hangout!

So get this – I know a lot of people who have herpes, but they are so secretive about it, they don’t realize how many other people in the community have it as well. So I decided to host an event at Shameless Grounds this Tuesday and invite everyone and anyone to come and learn […]

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Melt (or Sex & Waffles on Cherokee Street)

We all know about smoking the customary after sex cigarette. But what do you do after phone sex? You eat waffles, that’s what! We here at SEX+HQ have always found waffles to be very sexy. Well, maybe not the actual waffle so much as the way the waffle receives the syrup. But always having syrup […]

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Active Transportation for Health at Every Size (Part 1 of 2)

Here at Sex Positive St. Louis, from Clothing Optional Meetups to the World Naked Bike Ride, we’re all about body acceptance. So, when I heard that a friend from my undergrad days, personal trainer and mixed martial artist, Tracy Herold, was leading a discussion for TrailNet’s “TrailNet on Tap” series on Active Transportation for Health […]

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Active Transportation for Health at Every Size (Part 2 of 2)

This is part two of my interview with martial artist and personal trainer, Tracy Herold, on the Healthy at Every Size movement  and TrailNet’s TrailNet on Tap:  Active Transportation for Health at Every Size. Part one can be read here. Check out TrailNet on Tap: Active Transportation for Health at Every Size, Wednesday, August 28th at 7pm at Urban Eats Cafe […]

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Clever book designs featuring vulva…

“I’m always strangely delighted by clever book designs that involve the vulva,” says the gay male book designer. There’s something, er, ripe about the vulva that makes clever interpretations so damned engaging. The same simply cannot be said for graphic interpretations of the penis. Aside from Andy Warhol’s Velvet Underground album cover (see the bottom […]

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In Honor of World Naked Bike Ride: Nude News from Around the World

by David Wraith Did you know that St. Louis is host to one of the biggest World Naked Bike Ride’s in the country? Well, if you don’t know, now you know. Last week we celebrated Nude Recreation Week with our Bare As You Dare workshop, and now we’re eagerly awaiting the best naked party in […]

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Scar and Tell Recap

Last night, SEX+STL hosted a clothing optional, Scar and Tell event. This was an opportunity for our members to sit around as naked as they want and share as much as they felt comfortable about the scars they have sustained over their precarious years on this dangerous planet. Scars can be a source of embarrassment […]

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Vanilla

by The Vanilla Life My blog is to thank for getting the chance to write this guest post.  That little piece of the internet is about sex as I experience it and issues related to that.  More specifically, I write about what it’s like to be both vanilla and not; vanilla in the sense that […]

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Cunnilingus Demo Recap

Last month, SEX+STL hosted our first Cunnilingus Demo. Within a day of posting it on Meetup, we realized we would need to schedule another one later this year – the guest list AND waiting list maxed out in less than 24 hours! Pussy is definitely a hot topic. Pair that with live, educational sex demos […]

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How to Get Teens Pregnant

Here is how to ensure teenagers get pregnant and STIs: – shame and scare them – refuse to educate them Sooo… how about we not do that? Our society is obsessed with sex, but for the most part, mainstream culture either avoids frank discussion about sex, or it sensationalizes it in an unhealthy, negative way. […]

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Buy a Fucking T-Shirt!

SEX+STL T-Shirts will help you get all the girls. Or guys. Whatever you’re into. We don’t care. We’re Sex Positive St. Louis! If we cared, we’d be Sex Negative St. Louis. Did you know that SEX+STL T-Shirts are made in the USA by union workers paid a living wage? No, you didn’t know that, because […]

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How to Get Involved With SEX+STL

One of the most frequently asked questions we get is: “How can I get involved with Sex Positive St. Louis?” We’re so glad you asked! Our group is exciting, titillating, challenging, inclusive, accepting, friendly, and SO MUCH MORE. Our mission has changed lives! We’d love to get to know you and exchange open-minded ideas. There […]

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Rye (genderQueer erotica)

Meet Sam Rosenthal and hear excerpts from Rye Shameless Grounds’ new location! Saturday April 6th, 2013; 7PM; 1901 Withnell; St Louis MO 63118 With three trans* identified characters relating polyamorously and negotiating BDSM scenes, author Sam Rosenthal takes on quite the challenge in representing erotic love and friendship in all of these forms. His first […]

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Jealousy and . . . Violence?

by RunSilent RunDeep We have all probably heard of people who have gotten violent, or who have threatened violence, when they have discovered that their “significant other” has been in contact with someone who is not monogamous. Being reasonable and compersive people people, we have probably said to ourselves, “What in the world could possibly be up […]

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Sex and St. Louis: 1976

by guest author Henry Lee ed. note: check out Henry Lee’s story Service in Show Me: an erotic anthology It’s easy enough to locate books and articles on conventional St. Louis history. Subjects such as the 1904 World’s Fair, the cholera epidemic of 1849, and the rise and fall of the big breweries have been […]

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Pussy Party 2 Recap!

This month we hosted our second Pussy Party (here is a recap of our first Pussy Party .) There’s no doubt that every Pussy Party we host will have its own unique flavor. WHAT is a Pussy Party, you may ask? It’s a safe space for women to discuss and share the most intimate feminine […]

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Show Me Release Party!

Everybody needs a little release… Celebrate the release of Show Me, Sex Positive St. Louis’ collection of 10 pieces of short erotic fiction. Hot tales featuring places, cultures, and experiences that make life – and sex – in St. Louis unique! This will be the first collection of erotic stories to focus on Midwestern urban and suburban […]

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The Savage Art of Virtue and Vice

The  promo videos and other buzz have had me excited about this Saturday’s Savage Tarot II event. Besides the fact that the generous artists are donating 20% of sales to SEX+STL, the images are just fucking stunning. The Savage Tarot is a full, 78 card tarot deck that Michelle originally created as a limited edition […]

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Are Single Men Welcome at SEX+STL Events?

With our next clothing optional party coming right up (2nd Annual Fleshtivus!), we’ve had quite a few inquiries from folks new to SEX+STL. Here is an example: Dear SEX+STL, I’m a 45-year-old man who has had a reasonably happy sex life so far, though I started late (at 23). One reason for this late start […]

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Blowjob Demo Recap!

The other night Sex Positive St. Louis hosted a blowjob demo. I’ve always wanted to give a demo using a real, live man, instead of a dildo or other prop. The first challenge was finding the right guy for the demo. He had to be someone I liked and trusted, attractive, average-sized, good at receiving […]

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Fitting Party at Hustler Hollywood!

Walking into the Hustler Hollywood on Natural Bridge Rd.is like walking into a less-pink version of Victoria’s Secret — with sex toys. Win and Win! What’s impressed me lately, though, isn’t just the impressive sex toy selection (plenty for men and women!) or their ‘wall ‘o lube,’ but the lingerie. Larry Flynt’s boutique boasts a […]

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Sex and the Seriously Ill

Ed Note: This is a guest post written by B, a 55-yr-old man currently fighting a rare form of blood cancer. There is an undeniably strong connection between sex and physical health. People with active sex lives tend to be healthier. If sex, – especially imaginative sex – is part of your life, you’re likely […]

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How I Learned to Stop Worrying (and Love the Porn)

In honor of today’s discussion about smut (join us today at The Ethical Society from 11:00 to 1:00!), I’m going to reprint an essay I wrote back in December of 2010. by Johnny Murdoc When I moved in with my partner, I did something unthinkable: I stopped masturbating. Though we’d been sexually active before we […]

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Trans Folk Welcome

by David Wraith Most of the time, when Team SEX+ is out and about, it’s at our own events where most people we meet are fellow travelers.  The summer months gave us the chance to get out in the community and interact with people who are less familiar with who we are and what we […]

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The Ethical Side of Smut

Continuing the discussion started by Kate Lovelady’s “In Defense of Smut,” join The Ethical Society of St. Louis and Sex Positive St. Louis in a discourse about the role smut plays in our lives. How do you use smut? Do you feel guilt about your interaction with smut? Is it possible to integrate smut into […]

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A Weekend with Lee Harrington & Mollena Williams

How much would you pay to see an internationally known sex educator? How far would you travel? What if I told you that you don’t have to leave St. Louis? What if I told you that you could see not one, but two internationally known sex educators? What if I told you that you had […]

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Hustler Toy Store Tour September 4!

Join SEX+STL Tuesday, September 4 6pm for a FREE special store tour! Hustler Boutique, 9802 Natural Bridge Road, Berkeley, MO. I’m a sex toy EXPERT and I had a sneak preview the other day and it was SO enlightening! I learned about a lot of new toys and products and want to collect them all! […]

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The Half the Sky Movement

I am a whore. I am a very happy whore. Specifically, a white, middle-class, healthy, financially comfortable, independent woman who chooses to supplement her income with sex work because I find sex to be very therapeutic and pleasurable and want to share that positivity with others. I think people should be able to choose prostitution […]

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A Call for Sluts! – Slut Monologues Seeking Stories

As a proud slut, I wanted to share this message with others: Hello, my name is Joan. I am interested in exploring the possibility of creating a collection of monologues along the lines of the Vagina Monologues, only these would have to do with the notion of “Slut,” i.e., being called a slut, attitudes toward […]

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Be a Star in ShowMe!

Be part of St. Louis’ first collection of erotic fiction! You’ve probably heard about ShowMe, Sex Positive St. Louis’ collection of 12 pieces of short erotic fiction. Hot tales featuring  places, cultures, and experiences that make life – and sex – in St. Louis unique. This will be the first collection of erotic stories to focus […]

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Clothing Optional Pool Party II: The Revenge

by David Wraith You know what they say about summer blockbusters? They demand sequels. Last year’s Clothing Optional Pool Party was such a big hit; we’ve turned it into a franchise! Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water… Coming August 11th at 1pm to a ridiculously huge pool in […]

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SlutWalk St. Louis 2012: Big Ups, Mad Props and Sincere Thanks

by David Wraith SlutWalk 2012 was amazing. There are so many people to thank. Our Co-Sponsors: First, to Chip Schloss, Jim Kellogg and everyone at the Atomic Cowboy:  Everything we asked for, we got, quickly and courteously. We couldn’t ask for a more supportive venue. Thank you so much! To TransHaven: Claire Swinford, your presentation […]

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Tim Supports SlutWalk

Tim Lumpkins is a writer, photographer, printer, and lover of many things geeky. Check out his work at Tim Lumpkins Creative. SlutWalk is Saturday, July 14th.

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Courtney Supports SlutWalk

Courtney Armstead is a volunteer with SlutWalkSTL. SlutWalk is Saturday, July 14th.  

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Emily Supports SlutWalk

Emily Kothe is a blogger and activist. Her alter ego, Ginger Bangalore, is a burlesque performer with the Thunder Kittens. SlutWalk is Saturday, July 14th.

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Play Piercing 101

Ed Note: This is a guest post by Courtney, a professional piercer at TRX Studio on S. Grand in celebration of International Body Piercing Day (June 28)! Body piercing has long been used by humans as a way to decorate our skin.  Be it to identify ourselves with a group, express our individuality, or to […]

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SEX+STL Clothing Optional Weekend June 29th – July 1st

Nude Recreation Week is July 9th – 15th, but here at SEX+HQ, we can’t wait that long, so we’re ending June and kicking off July with a bang! A three day weekend of Clothing Optional events to help you cool off in this hot summer. Bare as You Dare: Radical Body Acceptance, June 29th, 7pm […]

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Blue Supports SlutWalk

Blue is an actress, singer, burlesque performer and activist. These days you can see her performing with The Ragged Blade Band. SlutWalk is Saturday, July 14th.

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Join Local Comic Shop Star Clipper for A Very Gay, Very Mutant Wedding

Our friends down at Star Clipper Comics want to share news that they’ll be throwing a celebration for the most talked about gay comic wedding (seriously, y’all, it was on The View): Wednesday, June 20th sees the wedding of X-Men Northstar to his human boyfriend Kyle. Star Clipper is going all out, sharing Northstar’s joy […]

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Siren Supports SlutWalk

Siren is one of St. Louis’ premier drag performers  and co-founder of Glitter Bomb Productions. Check her out Fridays at Attitudes Night Club or every second Saturday of the month at Shameless Grounds for Off the G.R.I.D. (Genderfuck Retro-Alternative Indie Drag). Follow her on Twitter: @ThatBitchSiren SlutWalk is Saturday, July 14th.

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SlutWalk STL 2012 Poster

by David Wraith The SlutWalk St. Louis 2012 posters will be hitting the streets soon, but I just had to share. Special thanks to photographer Allan Crain for shooting this beautiful image, and to all our models (left to right), Emily Kothe, Siren, Blue, Tim Lumpkins and Courtney Armstead. You’ll be hearing more from and […]

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Using Sex Toys Together

Ed Note: This is a guest post by Brandy. There is a very common misconception that sex toys are individual tools designed only for personal enjoyment. On some very basic level, this can be true, simply because most toys are only designed to please one person, physically, at a time. However, that doesn’t mean that […]

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Hustler Hollywood – Our New Sponsor!

SEX+STL is thrilled to announce our new relationship: Hustler Hollywood is in a domestic sponsorship with Sex Positive St. Louis. Be sure and Like their facebook page – click this link to see their latest major announcement! I just saw it and about wet my pants! We’re so excited – we’re kicking it off with […]

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March with SEX+STL in the Pride Parade!

It’s that time again! June is Pride Month and we’re looking for a few loud and proud sex positive peeps to march with us in this year’s Pride Parade. Our sex positive army is growing and what better opportunity for a show of strength that will act as a deterrent to the forces of sex negativity? […]

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ASK SEX+STL: Too Hairy?

A reader asks: I’m a St. Louis resident and I have been told by several women that I need to shave. I’m not sure what they mean by this, whether I need to shave my pubic area or my whole body? I have attached a picture of myself. Please let me know if you find […]

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The Gateway Burn

by David Wraith Many people are familiar with Burning Man, the annual weeklong festival that draws as many as fifty-thousand people to the Nevada desert each year.  What fewer people know is that all over the country there are regional “burns” (smaller, weekend camping events  inspired by Burning Man) based on the same creativity, non-conformity […]

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The Sound of Sexual Subcultures – an Interview with digitalcityscape

Welcome to this  ‘This Sexy American Life’  and in this act Mary Gould and Daniel Makagon make up the sound curation duo digitalcityscape.  Together, they create short audio documentaries on alternative sexuality in urban life.  Their first two pieces in this vein were set in Chicago — Daniel’s home base.   Leathermen follows the excitement of […]

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Imagining the Worst

SEX+STL Parenting Discussion – Sunday, May 20th, 3-4:30 at the LGBT Center (map) This post is on a parent’s concern about sexual abuse, but the discussion is about raising sex-positive kids in general. I remember playing at the Kings’ apartment. We were romping around – I, my friend Aaron and his older brother Kimani – […]

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SEX+STL Clothing Optional Yoga with Ami Amoré

Clothing Optional Yoga with Ami Amoré is held on Tuesdays Sundays in a private studio in South St. Louis. The fee is $10. Please bring a bottle of water, a towel, and a yoga mat. Class size is limited. Contact amorticious [at] gmail [dot] com  or RSVP via the SEX+STL Meetup group if you’d like to […]

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Nudism, Sex and Me, Part 3

This is a guest post by Magnum Chlenov, a Russian-American computer programmer living in St. Louis. In addition to being a sex-positive nudist, he is a fan of Doctor Who, Harry Potter and the Big Bang Theory, a stamp collector, an amateur author, an alternate historian and a fantasy hockey manager. He is happily engaged […]

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Don’t Know Dick: SEX+STL Trivia Tonight!

Tonight’s the night! For twenty lousy bucks, you get eight rounds of sex positive trivia hosted by your good friends Anna Bent, Kendra Holliday, Johnny Murdoc and David Wraith. Plus, an open beer and wine bar. Come for the trivia, stay to get an early start on a night’s drinking! Tickets will be available at […]

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Nudism, Sex and Me, Part 2

This is a guest post by Magnum Chlenov, a Russian-American computer programmer living in St. Louis. In addition to being a sex-positive nudist, he is a fan of Doctor Who, Harry Potter and the Big Bang Theory, a stamp collector, an amateur author, an alternate historian and a fantasy hockey manager. He is happily engaged […]

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Harmless, a film trailer

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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MO Republican State Rep Comes Out of the Closet

Missouri State Representative Zach Wyatt lives in Novinger, MO and represents the 2nd District, encompassing Adair county, Putnam county, and a part of Sullivan county. At 27, he’s already served in the Air Force, and shortly he’ll be retiring from politics to move to Hawaii and study marine biology, taking advantage of his veteran education […]

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Nudism, Sex and Me, Part 1

This is a guest post by Magnum Chlenov, a Russian-American computer programmer living in St. Louis. In addition to being a sex-positive nudist, he is a fan of Doctor Who, Harry Potter and the Big Bang Theory, a stamp collector, an amateur author, an alternate historian and a fantasy hockey manager. He is happily engaged […]

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Your Favorite Film (IN BED !!!)

Porn parodies are one of favorite sections of Spanky’s Video on North Lindbergh. I love how watching one of them keeps you from ever looking at the original the same way again! Lately, I’ve been able to watch a couple of parodies. One was fantastic (like its original) and one was a bust (like its […]

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Savage U

There are certain segments of the sex positive movement and its sister movements (feminists, gay rights activists, trans rights activists, etc…) that hate Dan Savage. Savage has been giving sex advice for decades now, and because of his quick mouth, acerbic wit, and admittedly stinging sense of humor, it’s easy to go back twenty years, […]

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Proof That Porn Stars Are Powerful!

Wank Out 2012 worked – even before everyone started playing with themselves! Thanks to a campaign launched by hot Vivid porn stars, Rick Santorum dropped out of the 2012 Presidential race. (If you’d like to learn more about Rick, please visit this website.) Watch their short public service announcement here: Porn Stars Against Santorum In […]

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Pussy Party Recap!

A dozen women attended Sex Positive St. Louis’ FIRST EVER Pussy Party, and it’s clear we need to host more parties like this!!! Every woman brought something different to the table. I, for one, brought mini-donuts, because they look like powdered-sugar cervixes, and we were going to see some awesome cervix  action that night! We […]

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Ending Sexual Assault St. Louis

One of the webmistresses of this tumblr tipped me off to it at a party a few weeks ago. April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, and over at SEX+STL, this is when we’ve begun to gear up for SlutWalk. Didn’t make it to the SlutWalk summit? Like us on Facebook to stay updated and offer […]

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Female Ejaculation Demo Recap!

As we walked up to the house where the female ejaculation demo was taking place, my partner muttered, “I feel like we’re attending a swinger’s party.” I laughed, “Why do you say that?” “We’re going to a random house in the suburbs, we’re carrying a bag full of sex toys, we’re about to witness a […]

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SEX+STL Discussion Group: Sex-Positive: What Does It Mean?

by David Wraith When we started Sex Positive St. Louis in 2010, some people heard the words “sex” and “positive” put together and assumed we were an organization for people living with HIV. Some suggested that we change the name. We decided early on that the term “sex positive” was so powerful and meaningful that […]

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Show Me: Anthology Deadline Extended!

We’ve received some wonderful submissions for our upcoming St. Louis erotica anthology, Show Me, and we’re happy to announce that the deadline has been extended! You now have until July 1st, 2012 to submit your stories and photography! DO YOU HAVE SAINT LOUIS FANTASIES? SHOW ME. Send us your fiction or non-fiction submission of sex […]

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Pussy Party April 10!

Attention women: Do you love your genitals? Were you taught that private parts were dirty?  Have you ever seen a cervix? Do you know where the g-spot is? Would you like to see a variety of women up close and personal? This is the “Show-Me” State, after all. Come share your vulva/yoni/pussy/cunt/vagina in a safe […]

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Female Ejaculation FAQ and Demo

A week from today is SEX+STL’s  first-ever demo & discuss night! We hope that it will be one of many.   Blow jobs, and sensation play are other topics that will likely pop up in the future. What do you want to see? What do you want to talk about.   This is how Friday’s […]

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Meet Author Robert Rosen on April 3!

Meet Robert Rosen, author of Beaver Street, next week in St. Louis! He’ll be making appearances at Shameless Grounds and Left Bank Books – see the end of this interview for more details! Q. Many experts such as scientists, journalists and researchers cover what I talk about – sex – in the abstract, and they […]

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Travis Mathews on Gay Stories, Media, and His Kickstarter Campaign

Travis Mathews is easily one of my favorite people. Whether it’s his documentary work like In Their Room or his narrative fiction work like I Want Your Love, Mathews is getting at the emotional core of a new generation, and reflecting it back for everyone else to see. Thanks to the magic of the internet, […]

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The Crack Fox: Ice Cream Porn Socials, Pussyfests and More!

Today we feature The Crack Fox, a downtown venue that showcases some of the hottest talent in town! What is The Crack Fox? Crack Fox is an alternative bar catering to the sub-culture in STL. We encourage self expression and are open minded to all walks of life. The name originates with the character Crack […]

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President of Planned Parenthood on The Daily Show

Cecile Richards, the President of Planned Parenthood, appeared on The Daily Show this week. I haven’t had the chance to watch the full extended version of the interview yet, but if it’s all as good as the short part that ran on the air, it’s worth your time. Here are the two parts: The Daily […]

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Ask the Man-Whore: The Insecure Virgin

by David Wraith Dear Man-Whore, I just want to say that I was inspired by the article you wrote about your penis size. Being a twenty-something guy who has  always been insecure about his size six penis, I felt like that article was about me. Now if I can just work up the  guts to […]

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In Defense of Smut: Kate Lovelady on Ethics and Sexuality

Some people think that sex positivity is just a fancy term for an  ‘anything goes’ sexual ethic — that people who describe themselves as sex positive don’t care about ethics at all. That’s of course, not true. But sometimes it’s easy to shy  away from paying attention to ethics and sex, because traditionally that has […]

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Why We Need Sex Ed – Fabulous Graphic

There’s a lot of talk about shutting down various reproductive rights in our country. This is based on fear and control coming from the patriarchy plaguing our society. (Patriarchy is the fear of the feminine and mature masculine.) These religious-based opinions are downright dangerous. Combating this ignorance are people like Jen and her team, who […]

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Ownership of My Body

by David Wraith When I was in my 20s and weighed 168 pounds, I couldn’t pay someone to take pictures of me naked. Mostly because I was a college student, working in a video store and didn’t have the money. The strange trajectory of my life has brought me to a place where, as I […]

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Queen of Hearts: Naked Dessert Bar

by David Wraith Two things in life that you don’t have to sell are sex and chocolate. They sell themselves; you merely have to offer them. So, you’d think that selling delicious, chocolate-covered desserts off the nearly naked bodies of some of St. Louis’s hottest bloggers and performers would be a no-brainer, right? One question? […]

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Queen of Hearts Update

Online ticket sales are now closed for the Queen of Hearts party, but don’t let that stop you! Tickets will still be available at the door! Come join us for what the Riverfront Times says is “sure to be the freakiest fundraiser of the year!”

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Planned Parenthood’s upcoming Sex Trivia Night

There are still a few tables available at Planned Parenthood’s upcoming fundraiser, Sex Trivia Night. While the SEX+STL table is full, we would love to see this event sell out. Unless you’ve been living in a cave, you know that the past few weeks have seen an onslaught of attacks on women’s reproductive rights. We […]

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Meet Life on the Swingset Feb 25!

If you attend our SEX+STL Queen of Hearts fundraiser this Saturday night, you’ll have the rare opportunity to meet Cooper and Marilyn Beckett of Life on the Swingset fame. They’re coming from out of town, just to be our guests of honor! I asked them a few questions so we can all get to know […]

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Typography Porn

Penguin Classics recently released a new translation of Vatsyayana’s Kama Sutra. I must say that, despite have little interest in reading the book in the past, the new design makes me wish I owned a copy: The porno-typography is the work of illustrator Malika Favre, and the new edition “offers a compelling modern translation of […]

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2-4-6-8, We Love to Masturbate!

Join us Sunday, February 12 at 3pm for a masturbation talk, led by me, Kendra! All genders, orientations, and backgrounds are welcome to attend this free event at the LGBT Center at 4337 Manchester Rd. This talk is sponsored by Spanky’s, who is donating two masturbation toys. Everyone who attends can enter to win the […]

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I Fucked David Wraith: Lee’s Story

by Lee Harrington   The first time I went on a date with David, I thought it was going to be a booty call. I had visions of lips on lips (as there had been earlier that night), hips on hips, his cock pumping in and out of me… But yeah, that did not happen. […]

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Two New Comic Releases Face Sexuality Head On

Today is a pretty big day for socially-and-sexually relevant comic books. Anyone who is/loves/sleeps with/knows a comic reader knows that Wednesday is New Comics Day, but you might not know exactly what’s hitting the shelves at your local comic store, or how relevant these stories are. I’ll admit that while I knew one of these […]

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Oh, No! James Deen Makes Girls Like Porn!

I know that this ABC Nightline report wasn’t supposed to make me happy, but it did: video platformvideo managementvideo solutionsvideo player “It’s your fault that people are looking at you!” “…and?” Maybe I have the same taste in straight porn as teenage girls, but James Deen is one of the few male-porn-stars-from-straight-porn that I actually […]

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Komen Foundation reinstates funding for Planned Parenthood

Via The Atlantic: “Facing a revolt among donors and supporters, Susan G. Komen For the Cure has just announced it has reversed its decision to de-fund Planned Parenthood. “One day, public relations scholars — if such a species exists — will make this week’s events at the Susan G. Komen For the Cure foundation a […]

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SEX+STL Stands With Planned Parenthood

News recently broke that the Susan G. Komen Foundation was pulling $700,000 worth of funding from Planned Parenthood, money that was used to give women access to affordable or free breast cancer screenings. This is just another reminder that the fight for reproductive rights is an ongoing struggle, and that the people who need family […]

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I Fucked David Wraith: Wink’s Story

Editor’s Note: This guest post by my friend and occasional lover, Wink, is the first in the “I Fucked David Wraith” series. Wink and I met at Beat Me in St. Louis and bonded over the fact that we both suffer from panic attacks and are wary of large crowds. by Wink Ever hear the […]

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More Info About the Queen of Hearts Ball Fundraiser Feb 25

Hey all you sexy people! Johnny Murdoc posted this notice about our upcoming Queen of Hearts  Ball  fundraiser Feb 25, and I’ve had a lot of people contacting me, asking for more information. I made this little video talking more about the event and why we’re doing it. Here is the summary, in case you […]

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Topless in Toronto

by Tastyleisti Editor’s Note: Last year, National Go Topless Day went largely uncelebrated in St. Louis. In our defense, fifty percent of our leadership was out of the country or embroiled in a child custody battle, the other fifty percent doesn’t have breasts. In the spirit of changing things in 2012, here’s a guest post by local blogger Tastyleisti. […]

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Ladies Henna Night Feb 3!

I have no tattoos. I’m too fluid for anything permanent. I have pale skin. I am a blank canvas. I love art. My body is a work of art in itself. I love experimenting with temporary body decoration, so I was eager to submit to Jeanjoel Spatafora‘s paintbrush, steady hand, and artistic vision. I booked […]

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The False Body Dichotomy

If you’re on any sort of social network, chances are pretty good that you’ve come across the following image, or one like it: If you’re like me, the first time you saw it, the first thing you thought was “Damn straight!” This has been the most prominent reaction that I’ve seen in the numerous comment […]

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Sex Positive St. Louis is Excited to Announce: Queen of Hearts

Saturday, February 25th, 2012 at The Absinthe Bar @ Lola 14th & Washington (enter from Washington Avenue) 7pm-10pm $20 admission. Advance tickets available at TicketWeb.com, or at any SEX+STL event. Free Food Drink Specials DJ Sweets Magicians, Naked Juggling, Tarot Card Readings Naked Sushi, Violet Wand Demonstrations And celebrity guests, Cooper & Marilyn from LifeOnTheSwingset.com […]

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Gateway Burners and Arch Reactor Present: Fire & Ice, Jan. 21st

  by David Wraith Most people are at least somewhat familiar with Burning Man, the annual festival in the Nevada desert that culminates with the burning of a giant effigy. However, few people outside of the Burning Man community are familiar with regional “burns,” or the smaller, Burning Man inspired events that occur all over […]

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How To Tell a True Porn Story

One of the lessons I’m going to give you in my writing talk tomorrow is a simple and important one: sit your ass in the chair and write. Ironically, I missed my own personal deadline for writing and posting this blog, so perhaps this is an important lesson in why I’m not perfect. Tomorrow’s event […]

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HypnoGasm: Trisha’s Story

Ed Note: On Monday we interviewed Eric Kendall, hypnotist. On Wednesday we featured Robin’s story. Today is Trisha’s turn! When I first asked Trisha to share her HypnoGasm story, she asked for it to be posted anonymously, which I was happy to do. But a few minutes later, she emailed me again, declaring, “on second […]

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Big Ups, Mad Props and Sincere Thank-You’s

by David Wraith SEX+STL started in late 2010, so 2011 represents our first full calendar year of existence. As the year draws to a close, I want to reflect on the fact that it takes way more than four people to keep even a small, not for profit, unlanded, grassroots  organization like SEX+STL going strong. […]

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HypnoGasm: R’s Story

Ed Note: On Monday we interviewed Eric Kendall, a sex hypnotist. SEX+STL volunteer R shares her very personal experience. I’ve always been interested in hypnosis and I’m also interested in sex, so when I saw that Shameless Grounds was hosting something called “HypnoGasm”, I knew I had to convince my boyfriend it was the perfect […]

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Capturing Your Sexy Self on Film

Or digitally anyway. “X has tagged you in a photo” – is a Facebook link that I never click. I generally hate pictures of myself – my face always seems to be shiny and I’m convinced that I’m fatter with every picture. The idea of having pictures of myself is great, and it’s fun for […]

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You Are Getting Horny: An Interview with Eric Kendall, Sex Hypnotist

I heard there was a sex hypnosis show at Shameless Grounds a while back, and was totally bummed I missed it! So I tracked down the hypnotist and asked him a bunch of questions. Eric Kendall offers “HypnoGasms” – you can check out his website (currently under construction) Q: Is it fair to say you […]

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Buck Angel’s Sexing the Transman XXX Jan 10!

2012 is Year of the Buck! Join me Tue Jan 10 7pm in Shameless Grounds library for a private screening of his latest extremely intimate exploration of a rarely seen subgroup – the transman. Buck Angel, master of redefining gender brings you never revealed secrets of transmen sexuality in Sexing the Transman XXX. This groundbreaking […]

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Taboo at The Hustler Club

by David Wraith The St. Louis BDSM scene had kind of a boom and bust year in 2011. FLOG, the fourteen year strong monthly play party, took an indefinite hiatus and later resurfaced as a non-play, social event. We saw the rise and fall of the much beloved Charenton Social Club as well as the […]

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An Interview with Sweets, SEX+STL DJ

Get to know one of SEX+STL’s resident DJs, Sweets, and then see him in action at the next big Glow event, which will be January Friday the 13th. Here are pics from a previous party – you can get more details and buy tickets here. Q: Who are you? A: I’m Tony Gallo aka Sweets, […]

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2011: The SEX+STL Year in Review

by David Wraith SEX+STL has been around just over a year and 2011 has been our first full calendar year of existence. Not to break our arms patting ourselves on the back, but I think we’ve accomplished a lot for a young, unlanded organization with no money, just some really dedicated people and a town […]

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On Polyamory: Ashley’s Take

Two weeks ago, I posted an essay called On Polyamory from my friend, Christina, and I promised to share with you two more essays: one by Christina’s husband and one by his girlfriend, Ashley. I meant for this to be a weekly series, but prepping for Christmas last week sucked up so much time that […]

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Fleshtivus Goes Viral

by David Wraith Not sure if “going viral” is the best phrase to use with regard to a clothing optional event put on by a sexuality organization, but that seems to be the case with our little Clothing Optional Meet Up, “Fleshtivus.” After Chad Garrison’s preview and follow-up posts on The Riverfront Times blog and […]

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How to Throw a Clothing Optional Meet Up

by David Wraith Clothing Optional Meet-Ups (COMUs) may be the most popular regular event thrown by SEX+STL. People want to be naked and be around other naked people. Not only do we always get a great turn out here in St. Louis, but we also get a lot of interest from people in other cities […]

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Happy Holidays! Love, Buck

Recently I was at Handlebar on Manchester, talking with somebody about drag shows  and she mentioned that she wished that she could see an all-king show here in St. Louis. I looked at her, shocked. “What about Monday nights next door?”, I blurted, referring to Novak’s weekly king shows. She hadn’t heard of St. Louis’ […]

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I Fucked David Wraith

“Somehow, the fact that your life has now brought you to the point where you actually just sent out an email asking if anyone who has slept with you could please write it up on a blog, doesn’t surprise me. I knew this day would come.”     Have you had sex with me? Do […]

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Naked Bodies

By Ginger Bangalore Editor’s Note: I don’t impress easily (in fact, I’m an opinionated prick) so when I like something, it’s worth mentioning. This an abridged version of a post on my new favorite local blog, The Rambling Method by Ginger Bangalore. Ginger is a blogger, burlesque performer with the Thunder Kittens, and a burgeoning sex posivite […]

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On Polyamory: A Guest Post

Recently, a friend of a friend wrote a blog post called “Adventures in Polyamory,” about his relationship with our mutual friend, Christina. On the way to her house I asked her where her husband was that night. “At home” came the thoughtless reply. Oh fuck. And like that we were walking into her house. Within […]

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The 35-Year-Old Virgin

by David Wraith My friend “Lisette” (not her real name) has a beautiful face, a gorgeous head of hair and (although she’s loathe to admit it) a pretty kick-ass body. She’s smart, well read, witty and charming. I’ve been trying to get in her pants for over twenty years, to no avail. I am comforted, […]

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You Would Even Say It Glows

“If you have a problem with nudity, you have a problem with humanity.” – Amanda Azim Drew Digital has been putting on Glow events all over town. Here are pics from the first Glow event. These parties primarily feature DJs and bodypainting. You can’t very well paint a body when it’s covered in clothes now, […]

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From Cage to Erotic Den: Esther Perel’s ‘Mating in Captivity’

Sex is a state of grace. In a cage it can’t take place. Break the cage, then start in and try. -D.H. Lawrence  Esther Perel, a licensed psychotherapist  specializing in intercultural relationships, delves into the question of maintaining passion in long-term relationships. She sees the challenge here as one of fostering the closeness that intimacy […]

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Ethical Polyamory in the Age of AIDS (and Other STIs)

by David Wraith This post is inspired by World AIDS Day and this post on The Beautiful Kind website. Those of you who know me have probably heard me refer to myself as a “free range, poly man-whore.” By that I mean that I am polyamorous, but not part of a closed poly circle or […]

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Clothing Optional Meet Up – Fleshtivus Dec 13!

So these clothing optional parties we’ve been hosting have turned into one of our most popular events! They each have a fun theme, and so far, have been in a different location every time. Our next one is scheduled for December 13 6:30-9:30pm, at a private residence in South City. The theme is FLESHTIVUS! The […]

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So Thankful

Here is what I am thankful for this holiday season: 1. My extended family My entire family knows who I am, what I am about, and accepts me. I am surrounded by love. 2. My partner He knows me better than I do. He soaks up my anxieties and keeps me sane. He’s so magnificent, […]

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Chasing Midori

by David Wraith Note: This is part two of my “I’m in Love with Midori” series. Part one can be read here. If you ask Midori where she lives, she’ll probably tell you that her mail is delivered to San Francisco, but she lives on an airplane. As a full time, traveling sex educator, Midori’s […]

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Show Me: Erotic St. Louis Anthology

Last night, at the incredibly successful Sex Positive St. Louis Out Loud (if you weren’t there, you should feel bad), SEX+STL announced our new project, Show Me: an erotic anthology of stories set in St. Louis. We’re looking for prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction, and photography. Check out our submissions call: DO YOU HAVE SAINT LOUIS […]

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I’m in Love with Midori

by David Wraith I’m not sure when I first became aware of Midori, but I’m sure it was some time in the mid to late 90s. Back then she was known as Fetish Diva Midori. I’m not sure when or why she dropped the “Fetish Diva.” Perhaps like P. Diddy’s “P”, she thought it was […]

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Why Buck Angel is My Hero

Ed Note: This is a guest post by Courtney, a professional piercer at TRX Tattoo and Piercing Studio on South Grand. Meet Buck Angel next week at Washington University’s Trans* Awareness Week! He’ll be speaking on Monday and Tuesday evening. I am happy to say that,  as a society, our awareness of the broad spectrum […]

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Keeping up with A Billion Wicked Thoughts

Things have been crazy busy in my world lately, and I’ve missed lots of events. The one I was saddest to miss was the first-ever SEX+STL book club at the end of  October. Of course being out of town didn’t stop me from reading the October selection, and I found myself in for a fun […]

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SEX+STL Out Loud: Author, Marie Haynes

by David Wraith Some say the first rule of writing is “write what you know.” If this is true, then it’s safe to assume that St. Louis area author, Marie Haynes, knows sex, sadomasochism and… food. Her novel, Tasting Pleasure, is the tale of an American expatriate trying to launch a catering company in Great Britain. […]

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TONIGHT: Is There a Sacred Dimension to Human Sexuality?

by Johnny Murdoc Tonight, Ben Schuldt’s Responsible Public Debate and The Ethical Society of St. Louis are hosting a debate, “Is there a sacred dimension to human sexuality?” SEX+STL’s Anna Bent will debate Matthew Anderson, author of Earthen Vessels: Why Our Bodies Matter to Our Faith and contributor to the blog Mere Orthodoxy. I’m genuinely […]

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The Dick Chronicles: In Summation

  by David Wraith So, how was your month? Mine was interesting. Welcome to the fourth and final post in The Dick Chronicles.  Although, SEX+STL co-founder, Anna Bent did suggest making The Dick Chronicles an annual event where I write about my dick exclusively every October. Call it, “Dicktober!” Before I go any further, I […]

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Meet Michael, Your Friendly Neighborhood Repulsed Asexual

Oct 23-29 is Asexual Awareness Week! Meet Michael, another representative from the Asexual Awareness Movement. Kendra: What is asexuality? Michael: Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction. Both the words “sexual” and “attraction” are vitally important here. The latter underlies the fact that the label is independent of any type of behaviour: it is possible […]

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(A)sexuality: The Making of a Movement

Oct 23-29 is Asexual Awareness Week! That’s right now! To celebrate, SEX+STL refrained from all sexual activity this week. Just kidding. Actually, we hosted a screening last week of the new documentary working the nationwide film festival circuit: Asexuality: The Making of a Movement. I like to joke that I’m the opposite of asexual. Does […]

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Monday Night Movie Pick: Love Ranch

What keeps me going is that through all the lies, I know the truth. We had it. Him and me for a moment. Love and truth together. Finally. And forever. Hey, how many people can say that? – Grace Bontempo Terry Hackford’s 2010 drama takes its inspiration from Joe and Sally Conforte’s Mustang Ranch, the […]

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The Dick Chronicles: Stupid Dick Tricks

The stapler will make sense later, trust me. by David Wraith I remember the first really dumb thing I ever did with my dick. It had nothing to do with a woman I was sticking it in. It was at a meeting of an organization called PEP (People Exchanging Power) in the upper floor of […]

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Meet Vlad Drăculea, Asexual

In honor of Asexuality Awareness Week Oct 23-39, SEX+STL hosted a screening of the documentary Asexuality: The Making of a Movement last night. It was quite the mindbender! I’ll post my thoughts on it next week, but for now, get to know Vlad Drăculea. Kendra: What is asexuality? Vlad: Asexuality is a sexual orientation where […]

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Meet Melanie, An Asexual

In honor of Asexuality Awareness Week Oct 23-39, we ask Melanie, a woman who identifies as asexual, a few questions. SEX+STL will be hosting a screening of the documentary Asexuality: The Making of a Movement Tuesday, October 18, 7pm. We’ll let you know how it goes! Kendra: What is asexuality? Melanie: Asexuality is a sexual […]

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The Dick Chronicles: Projectile Dysfunction

by David Wraith Funny story: So, I’m on a first date with this girl I’d been crushing on for months. We go back to my place and after a lot of foreplay, I had what I thought was a reliable erection. Literally, the moment I put it in, it went limp. I didn’t get off […]

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An Interview With The Asexual Sexologist

Note: This interview from a few months ago is being republished in honor of Asexuality Awareness Week, which is October 23-29. SEX+STL will be hosting a free screening of the documentary Asexuality: The Making of a Movement Tuesday, October 18, 7pm at a private home theater in South City St. Louis. Please RSVP to me […]

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On Coming Out

Today is National Coming Out Day, so I’ve spent most of the morning reflecting on the idea of “coming out” and what that means. When I’ve written about the subject previously (see: “If you’re not out, you’re hurting us”), I’ve discussed the political ramifications of being out. I still believe that, over all, it’s those […]

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The Dick Chronicles: Size Matters

  by David Wraith I read an article in a magazine a few years ago asserting that, in the single’s scene, a person’s worth is often reduced to two arbitrary numbers. For women, it’s their age and their weight. For men, it’s their annual income and penis size. Each number is often lied about, but […]

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City Jerks

One of the tiny—but beloved—joys that I have is experiencing a discussion about sex or sexuality in media that I wasn’t expecting, especially when it’s nuanced. Sunday night, my roommate and I decided to start watching Louie, Louis C.K.’s current sitcom, while we ate dinner. After a reasonably funny first episode, we decided to start […]

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Coming Soon! The Dick Chronicles

And, to get you in the mood for next week, check out this video by Mickey Avalon and the Dyslexic Speed-Readers:

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Male Etiquette Class Sept 22

The other day I had a guy write to me: I am wondering if you might be able to provide some advice on how to interact with women better. I realize I am not very good at starting or maintaining conversations, recognizing when a woman is flirting with me, or flirting with a woman. I […]

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So long,”Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

There’s little that I can say that isn’t being said by others, but I think that Homo Riot’s poster sums up my feelings best of all: (art by Homo Riot.) -Johnny Murdoc

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Thursday Music Video: Ani DiFranco, In or Out

-by Johnny Murdoc This song was a hugely reinforcing when I was in high school, not just when I was a little gay boy pretending I was bi, but when I came around to being cool with actually being homo. This song has such a wonderfully playful—but honest—attitude to it that I found really empowering: […]

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I Don’t TRUST This Spray

A straight male friend of mine in his 40’s who has had a lifelong struggle relating to women sent me this youtube video on Trust spray and asked me if I thought it would help him attract women. Trust spray is a product that is supposed to make people trust you, which I guess means […]

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Do All Real Women Have Curves?

by David Wraith I was trolling for naked pictures of my friends on FetLife, like I do, when I stumbled upon the picture to the right and the controversy it was causing. Lots of people were co-signing and amenning the sentiment, but a few people were expressing their displeasure with it. At some point in […]

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Your Friday Morning Inspirational Poster

(I wish I could tell you exactly where this came from, but it popped up in my Tumblr feed uncredited. This (possibly NSFW) blog appears to be its source.)

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The Anti-Pickup Artist

by David Wraith I used to jokingly refer to myself as an “anti-pickup artist.” In my 20s this was meant to symbolize my abject failure with women. I made a fool out of myself chasing women who had no interest in me (to stalkerish proportions), I was clueless about how to flirt and oblivious to […]

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Don’t Be It, Dream It

Natty Soltesz is one of the most prolific gay erotica writers that I know. His work has been included in several anthologies (many of which include the word “best” in the title) and he’s contributed dozens of stories to the Nifty Erotic Archives, where I first came across his work (pun possibly intended.) I’ve had […]

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The Randy Dandies find the Pearl: an interview with Mimi Le Yu

When I found out that Mimi Le Yu, one of my favorite burlesque performers, was fronting a new troupe called the Randy Dandies, I couldn’t keep away from their show Melons and Meat Sticks: a Dandy Backyard Burly-Q.  It was one of the best shows I’ve every seen. The storyline was entertaining and better developed than […]

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Gay Catholic Priest Breaks Silence Over Church Abuse of Power

Richard Wagner, Ph.D., is the only Catholic priest in the world with a doctorate in human sexuality. He is a gay man and the author of the seminal work, Gay Catholic Priests: A Study of Cognitive and Affective Dissonance.  The media firestorm that erupted after its publication and the backlash within his religious community because […]

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Cosmocking

True Confession time:  I read Cosmo sex advice for years.  As my interest in women grew, and it was clear that Cosmo didn’t have any sex advice for queer girls (no kidding!), I stopped actually buying the dreck 9 or  10 years ago. Still, Ive been a faithful grocery-line reader until recently. Stopping even my […]

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Meet Bella Bazooka Aug 24

Bella Bazooka is coming to town. Details are here. I invited her to be the guest of honor at a SEX+STL Happy Hour. We’ve been friends for the past five years, accomplishing great things in our respective towns. She is the Owner and Editor of Bazooka, a monthly alternative weekly publication that shakes the southern […]

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Go Topless Day August 21

My friend posted this status on facebook today: “pet peeve: when parents force their toddler daughters to wear a bikini top at the beach. Its the last time she’s not breaking any laws. Let her be.” One of MY big pet peeves is the fact that men are allowed to go topless in St. Louis, […]

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Ethical Monogamy

by Anna This past Sunday’s Coffee Talk  on monogamy was exciting for me not only because it was the first one that I have been able to attend, but also because it covered a topic that has been on my mind for the past couple of years. Most of my romantic relationships could be described […]

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Coffee Talk: Monogamy 101

Join SEX+STL today at 3:00pm at Shameless Grounds (click here for directions!) for Monogamy 101. We’ll discuss the nuts and bolts of making a one-on-one relationship function. Communication, fantasy, jealousy, fidelity—we’ll challenge all of your assumptions about what monogamy means. (photo by Johnny Murdoc. Yes, he’s aware that he’s using a photo of a poly […]

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Lauren Rosewarne Discusses “Part-Time Perverts” Aug 18

Our friends at Subterranean Books are hosting Dr. Lauren Rosewarne on her cross country book tour. A Lecturer with the School of Social and Political Sciences at the University of Melbourne and author of Part-Time Perverts: Sex, Pop Culture, & Kink Management, we’re excited to welcome Lauren and give her a warm Midwestern welcome! Kendra […]

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Watching Porn in Public

The first time I watched porn with other people, it was five years ago. My partner and I threw this party… Wait, that’s a lie. The first time I watched porn with another person was years before that. My best friend and I found a small box of porn films and we watched them together. […]

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Dan Savage’s New Threat for Presidential Hopeful Rick Santorum:

Funny, probably not serious (although we can always hope!), and definitely Not Safe For Work: Dan Savage’s New Threat to Rick Santorum from Dan Savage

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Shameless Grounds Cherry Jubilee This Weekend!

A word from our friends at Shameless Grounds regarding this upcoming weekend! I will be there Saturday night, how about you? RSVP here! We here at Shameless Grounds want you to be at our first annual Cherry Jubilee! Gay, straight, trans, kinky, poly, queer or completely vanilla-this is a festival for everyone, from the gathering place […]

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SEX+STL Trivia, Tomorrow Night @ HandleBar

SEX+STL (that’s us!) and The Handlebar are teaming up to bring you a sexually charged trivia night. Teams of 1-4 sex scholars will be competing for a $50 gift certificate donated by TRX Tattoos on S. Grand. There is no entry fee—this party is completely free! (Although, you should plan on bringing some dough for […]

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After SlutWalk

by David Wraith A couple days before SlutWalk, my friend and SEX+STL co-founder, Kendra Holliday expressed concern that participants would need aftercare following such an intense experience. Intellectually, I knew exactly want she meant, but I have to admit that on a gut level, I just didn’t get it. Maybe it’s because I’m a man. […]

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Minds Wide Open Project

There’s a new photography project in town that is very sex-positive, care to participate? MY photoshoot is tomorrow, and I can’t wait for my truth to be captured in a bold and brave way that I’ve never done before! Here I interview the artist behind the project, Michelle Wagner. Kendra Holliday: Who are you? Michelle […]

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SlutWalk St. Louis Wiped Me Out!

I wasn’t expecting to sob. I mean, I knew SlutWalk St. Louis would be an emotional and empowering day, but I had no idea how it would play out for me and the 600 others who attended. The march kicked off at noon, and traveled down Manchester Road. The Riverfront Times captured it beautifully, take […]

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SlutWalk St. Louis: Surviving Rape with Purpose and Conviction

by Lunamax Ed Note: This is a guest post from Lunamax, one of the 600 who attended SlutWalk St. Louis on July 16. Do you have a story to share? Email to sexpositive.stl @ gmail .com I initially chose to attend the St Louis SlutWalk to support a mission and ultimately support rape and “slut shaming” […]

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Literary Nudes July 17

Literary Nudes is having a special extra nude edition on Sunday, July 17, 7pm, at Shameless Grounds. Proceeds go to Sex Positive St. Louis, so come on out and join the intellectually enlightened nude community! Burlesque performer Sugar Cyanide gives us the lowdown. Kendra Holliday: What is Literary Nudes? Sugar Cyanide: Literary Nudes is a […]

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SlutWalk St. Louis July 16

The SlutWalk movement started this April in Toronto, when a cop said: “women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized.” In response, more than 3000 people took to the streets to demonstrate that being assaulted isn’t about what you wear. Thousands more have followed suit around the world. A tiny negative […]

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Manning Up with Christopher Sean Watson

by David Wraith “Men continue to control the narrative and experiences of women, which leads to violence being an acceptable form of control.” If there’s a man I know with feminist street-cred, it’s Christopher Sean Watson. When I met him, he was a field organizer for Amnesty International, but check out his CV: He was […]

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Clothing Optional Tweet Up – July 31st

The next Clothing Optional Tweet Up will be Sunday, July 31st from 3pm – 8pm. This one will be a pool party on a secluded property in Northern Florissant. This is a private event with a screened guest list and a limited number of people. People we know and or who have attended past SEX+STL […]

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Interview with Henryk Ptasiewicz, Featured Artist

Get to know one of the featured artists from the SEX+STL June 29 Black and White event. Here is a SEX+STL interview with one of the most talented – and most humble – artists in St. Louis, Henryk Ptasiewicz. Kendra Holliday: You have such a unique accent! Can you give us a little background of […]

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Nobody does it like Roseanne

At the Black and White party last week, I briefly mentioned Roseanne to David Wraith, as part of a conversation about Sandra Bernhardt. Wraith noted that he never really got into Roseanne. While I’m certain there are thousands of people out there like Wraith, I’m just as certain that there are thousands of people out […]

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Intention, Attention and Awareness: Figuring out Consent, pt. 2

Because you, and the world, deserve our full presence, our full attention, our full passion, and our fully engaged awareness. ~Lee Harrington The much-delayed part 2 to my first Figuring out Consent post! I’m so excited about the July 16th Slutwalk in St. Louis. I won’t get to be there myself, but it has me […]

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Evolved bendable You Too

There I was, innocently interviewing my friend Holli from Spanky’s on my The Beautiful Kind show, when, at the end of the segment, she asked if I wanted the crazy pink sex toy she had showcased earlier. You know, the one that looked like Pink Panther’s dick doing yoga. Yes, she hooked me up with […]

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Stefon Beckons You to Black and White, June 29th

“Black and White: Indifference amongst Difference” looks to be an awesome party. But don’t just take our word for it, listen to this message from our city correspondent, Stefon: Black + White (mp3)

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Wear Black & White This Wednesday

Sex Positive St. Louis is proud to present: A shot of the toys donated by Spanky’s for the silent auction: Can’t wait to see what everyone is wearing! It will be my first time reading my erotic writing out loud. There will also be readings from Johnny Murdoc, David Wraith, and Elva Maxine Beach. See […]

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How to Meet the Domme of Your Dreams: Part 3

by Mistress Simone Editor’s Note: This is part 3 of a 3 part series. Part 2 can be read here. Top Ten Submissives to Not Be:   1. Micro Manage Me: This sub wants a dominant to control every aspect of their life so they can relinquish responsibility for all. Calling me every five minutes asking […]

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Writers are Sexy: Elva Maxine Beach

by David Wraith I adore Elva Maxine Beach! I first met her when we were both performing in a benefit she organized at The Way Out Club. She showed me her book, “Neurotica” and I immediately laid hands upon the woman and prayed for her salvation. Then I read the book and realized I should […]

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Lessons from a Simulated Love Affair

This is a guest post from Robin, SEX+STL volunteer and mother of two. Please join us Monday, June 27 for our next Sex Positive Parenting group at Shameless Grounds, 7pm! My favorite Sim is a bit of a cad. Devon is high in charisma, but low in commitment.  He has had 10 girlfriends, each of […]

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Barack Obama, Gay Rights, and “Post-Mo”

Forgive me the stream-of-consciousness writing that is this blog post. I’ve spent the past few days writing an essay about Barack Obama’s progress on gay rights. It’s a frustrating task to undertake (especially in light of the events I’m about to write about). I like Obama and I think he’s made great strides in gay […]

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How to Meet the Domme of Your Dreams: Part 2

by Mistress Simone Editor’s Note: This is part 2 of a 3 part series. Part 1 can be read here.     Turn-Ons: (God, I feel like a Penthouse Pet): Self Confidence: Not cockiness! Having self knowledge about what you like and dislike enough to communicate it. Wit: Not smart-asses or rudeness. A witty remark […]

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Join a kiss-in tomorrow at LUSH to support gay marriage!

I tend to have mixed feelings about corporate-led protests, but I’m pretty fond of LUSH, a bath and beauty products company that aims to eliminate waste in their products, and makes everything with vegetarian ingredients. For full disclosure, we (meaning several of SEX+STL’s co-founders) have a friend who works at LUSH as well (although, to […]

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What is a Munch?

  This is a guest post by Naamaire. You may have seen announcements on the Sex Positive St Louis events calendar or BDSM-themed sites that “The South City Whip Club” or some such organization is having a munch at a particular place at a particular time. Maybe you live in the South City area and […]

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Bodies, Bodies, Bodies! Gender-Inclusive Sex-Positivity

A guest post by Andy Semler If you were to peek into my bedroom window one evening, there’s a good chance you’d be greeted with the sight of two steamy-hot naked bodies (lucky you!). Mine: slender limbs, white skin, short hair, small breasts, hourglass waist. The other: muscular, white skin, short hair, large bone structure, […]

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World Naked Bike Ride 2010

Last year’s World Naked Bike Ride: St. Louis was a bit of a revelation to me. There simply is no experience comparable to riding through the streets of your city with hundreds of other cyclists wearing costumes, underwear, or nothing. Tonight is World Naked Bike Ride 2011, so in order to stir up some excitement, […]

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How to Meet the Domme of Your Dreams: Part 1

by Mistress Simone A man’s own manner and character is what most becomes him. – Cicero Please keep in mind that the opinions expressed within this article are my own. You may not share them or agree, but I do hope you will listen and they will provide some enlightenment for how dominant women work.  […]

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Mr. Missouri Leather 2011, DJ Kaiser

by David Wraith I ran into DJ Kaiser a few months ago at South City Diner, shortly after he’d started Bad Boys of St. Louis. Having only met him in passing, I thought we’d make small talk for a few minutes. We ended up talking for well over an hour about the sex positive atmosphere in St. […]

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Cornerstones of Community: How to Build Relationships from the Ground Up

      This is a guest post by Lenore Spitznagel, a Leader from Diana’s Grove Mystery School. Relationships are tough! Engaging with a partner, an acquaintance or even a stranger can leaves us vulnerable to misunderstandings, hurt feelings and even rejection. Add sex to the equation and there is even more to lose. Diana’s […]

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Gay Pride Month

For the third year in a row, President Obama has declared June as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month. The story of America’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) community is the story of our fathers and sons, our mothers and daughters, and our friends and neighbors who continue the task of making our […]

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The Black and Lou Pride Ball

This Friday, June 10th, is the first ever Black and Lou Pride Ball. Our good friend DJ Kaiser is on the event committee and he gave us the low down. Be on the lookout this Thursday for my full length interview with DJ, the current Mr. Missouri Leather, on his impressive 9th place finish at […]

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World Naked Bike Ride 2011 is Coming to St. Louis!

by David Wraith Some people love to ride their bicycles. Some people (like me) just love being naked. Every year since 2008, for one glorious summer night, cycling enthusiasts, enthusiastic nudists and everyone in between have come together for the World Naked Bike Ride St. Louis. If you live in St. Louis and riding a […]

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March with SEX+STL in the Pride Parade!

  Sex Positive St. Louis is looking for a few good humans to march with us in the 2011 PrideFest St. Louis Pride Parade, Sunday, June 26th. Benefits of Marching with SEX+STL Low Impact Cardiovascular Workout Exposure to Sunlight for Photosynthetic Purposes Fresh Air You Will Be 50% Sexier at the End of the March […]

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It Gets Beautiful: One Rabbi’s Perspective on Being Jewish and LGBTQ

Ed Note: This post was originally published on Huffington Post and is reprinted with permission from the author, Rabbi Andrea Myers. If you like this post, please check out her book, The Choosing: A Rabbi’s Journey from Silent Nights to High Holy Days’ (Rutgers University Press, April 2011). Living on Long Island as a sheltered […]

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Christian Sex, by The Shaman

This is a guest post by theologian and philosopher The Shaman, who would like you to know that Christianity and sex-positivity DO mix! Recently my wife attended the Susie Bright seminar at Shameless Grounds.  While she was there she noticed many people who seemed to think being sex positive and Christianity didn’t mix. We beg […]

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How Hedonistic? A conversation with artist and event coordinator Drew Digital

Tonight is SEX+STL’s fundraiser and happy hour, How Hedonistic? Growing on what we accomplished two months ago with our 7 Sexy Sins party, How Hedonistic? will have feature the artwork of three different artists, four DJs and an assortment of live nude models for artists to draw! Yesterday, I talked to Chris Worth, this morning […]

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How Hedonistic? Artist Profile: Marty Henderson

Tonight is SEX+STL’s fundraiser and happy hour, How Hedonistic? Growing on what we accomplished two months ago with our 7 Sexy Sins party, How Hedonistic? will have feature the artwork of three different artists, four DJs and an assortment of live nude models for artists to draw! Yesterday, I talked to Chris Worth, one of […]

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How Hedonistic? Artist Profile: Christopher RJ Worth

Tomorrow night is SEX+STL’s fundraiser and happy hour, How Hedonistic? Growing on what we accomplished two months ago with our 7 Sexy Sins party, How Hedonistic? will have feature the artwork of three different artists, four DJs and an assortment of live nude models for artists to draw! In order to drum up some excitement, […]

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Let’s Make it a ‘Hell Yes!’: Figuring Out Consent, Pt. 1

by Anna Bent Author’s note: just to be clear, this discussion of consent is about cultural, relational and community standards, not legal ones. Solutions regarding the morass that is the justice system’s (in)ability to deal with sexual assault is WAY above my paygrade. Anyway, I’m more interested in figuring out ways of relating that might […]

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Sex Positive Parenting May 16!

Last month, we were honored to have Susie Bright debut our sex-positive parenting group. Our next one will be Monday, May 16, 7pm at Shameless Grounds, hosted by Charlotte Times and myself. This will be a kid-free discussion group in the library. “In America today, it is nearly impossible to publish a book that says […]

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Body Image Talk May 15

Do you ever think badly about your body? We ALL do, men and women alike, and we want to talk about that! Charlotte Times will lead a body image talk this Sunday, May 15 3pm at Shameless Grounds. Behold before and after pictures of Ms. Charlotte: An excerpt from her wildly entertaining blog, The Life […]

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2nd Clothing Optional Tweetup Scheduled!

We had such a great first clothing optional tweetup, we’re going to give it another whirl. Sex Positive St. Louis is proud to host our SECOND clothing optional tweetup! The next one is scheduled for May 10, 6:30-9:30pm. This is a FREE event. Location is a private residence in South City area. Please RSVP to […]

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Dine Out for Life, Support STL Effort for AIDS!

Today is Dining Out for Life, an annual nationwide fundraiser to support local AIDS programs and services. In St. Louis, those services are provided by St. Louis Effort for AIDS, and if you visit one of the dozens of participating restaurants today, at least 25% of your bill will go to STLEFA. Dining Out for […]

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Damiana! Herbal Aphrodisiacs

I’m drinking Love Tea right now. Here is what’s in it: Cinnamon, Damiana, Violet Leaf, Rose Hips & Rose Petals. We have an amazing shop here in St. Louis called Cheryl’s Herbs. Nestled in downtown Maplewood on Manchester, it’s a fantastic local resource for dried herbs, aromatherapy, essential oil extracts, and natural medicine. Forget the […]

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QFest Film Reviews by Shän

What did you see at QFest this year?  Annually, QFest brings some of the best in LGBT-centered films to St. Louis.  If , like me, you are pretty bummed about having had to miss it, then Shän Lewis’ enlightening reviews below is just the ticket for keeping up and filling your wishlist with DVDs.  See […]

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Temptations Adult Toy Party April 25!

Temptations parties are often referred to with a giggle or a wink – “one of THOSE kind of parties.” An adult toy party is a little bit like any other home sales party – from cookware to candles, almost everyone has been invited to come to their friend’s house at some point, and to bring […]

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Susie Bright: St. Louis, I Do Mind Dying

by Susie Bright Ed Note: This is an excerpt from a blog post that appeared on susiebright.com, August 21st, 2005. Republished with permission. You may remember last year, I wrote about visiting  St. Louis for a Romance Novel convention. I talked about the Romancers, but not about the city of St. Louis, which was actually the more […]

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I’m in Love with Susie Bright

by David Wraith I have a confession to make. I’m in love with Susie Bright. It’s cool, my girlfriend already knows. My love affair with Susie has gone on for almost twenty years and Susie has been vaguely aware of it herself for at least the last seven. I’m not sure who introduced me to her, […]

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The Goal of Sex Positive St. Louis

The other day I was having lunch with a designer/photographer team who want to collaborate on a Sex Positive St. Louis project, and the designer leaned back in his chair, folded his hands behind his head and asked crisply, “So, what does Sex Positive St. Louis hope to achieve?” First of all, it’s blowing my […]

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Slut Walk in Toronto

It’s awesome when somebody’s dumbassery leads people to come together and address an issue so loudly that the good drowns out the original bad. Last January, a police officer was doing a sexual assault prevention training at York University in Toronto and opined that “women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized.” In protest […]

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Webster Drag Ball 2011

This time several years ago, I was running around U-City thrift stores looking  for the perfect suit, shirt and hat.  Missouri Council for the Blind came through, as it so often does, and I got a shirt for a surprisingly good price at Rag-A-Rama.  My date loaned me his hat.  There was a lot of […]

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“Dear Sex Worker Hater:”

Today we’d like to share an excerpt from Maggie Mayhem’s recent editorial about the “PornWikiLeaks” scandal. From The Daily Beast: “…Porn Wikileaks, a website that became infamous on Wednesday after Gawker.com ran a story about the renegade website’s attempts to expose the identities of thousands of porn performers. (Gawker also implied that Porn Wikileaks has […]

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On Barebacking, Part 2 by Lars Eighner

Back in August of 2010, writer Lars Eighner posted a couple of essays about (gay) bareback sex and (gay) bareback porn that I’d like to share. Thankfully, Eighner released the essays to the public domain, so a few weeks ago I posted the first part, and today I’m posting the second. The reason Eighner’s essays […]

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Susie Bright is Coming to St. Louis

Author, educator and sex positive pioneer, Susie Bright will be in St. Louis on April 17th & 18th. For those of you who don’t know, Susie Bright has been writing about sex, alternative lifestyles, BDSM, porn and polyamory  for more than two decades. She was the founding editor of the On Our Backs, the first lesbian sex […]

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Bisexual Alliance of St. Louis

Are you bisexual and live in the St. Louis area? Have I got a group for you. BASL, or Bisexual Alliance of St. Louis, is an informal group that has been around for 17 years. 17 years!!! It is a fluid organization that meets a few times a month, once as a family-friendly outing, and […]

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Women and Casual Sex Pt. 2: Respecting Conscious Choices

A lot gets made of women having casual sex.  Often it’s assumed that women don’t really want to have casual sex, but engage in it as a (misguided) strategy to start something long term.But  Helen Fisher quote a study that asked 515 people why they went into a hookup, 50 percent of women and 52 […]

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Meet BossBondage April 1!

BossBondage will be in town April 1 presenting classes at The Facility! Though he is also a piercing expert, these classes will be focused on learning the ropes: Intro to Western Shibari and Bedroom Bondage. I asked him some questions in order to get a better handle on what he’s all about: Kendra Holliday: You […]

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Women and Casual Sex, Pt. 1: Self-Discovery Through Yahoo! Profiles

While here in Germany I am pretty much celibate.  That’s for a few reasons, all  of which are boring, but one of them is that I’m not that interested in casual sex. This surprises me.  I like casual sex.  And I have had very good experiences with it.  Not only has it not been damaging […]

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St. Louis’ First Ever Clothing Optional Tweetup!

Last week I got to model nude in front of 100 people for the “7 Sexy Sins” fundraiser. Most of the people there were in awe and said they could never do something like that, but a few were jealous and wanted to be naked, too. Well, we have an event for you. Sex Positive […]

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Guess Who’s Coming to Beat Me: Michael Sol

Rope is simple; it’s the layers that create intricacy.

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How I Became Sex-Positive

  Ed Note: This is a guest post by Nora. If you’d like to share your sex-positive story, please contact us! Who am I? I’m a woman who loves men and women.  I am non-monogamous, in love with a man who is in love with me and another woman who is in love with him […]

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Pretty Abstract and Very Loud: St. Louis’s Own Drew Digital

by Johnny Murdoc Drew Thompson (aka Drew Digital) is a 28 year old artist from St. Louis and SEX+STL’s latest collaborator in our quest to foster a sex positive environment in the city. His work brings digital artwork alive in a way that has to be seen to be believed, one that can’t be captured […]

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The American Dream

Ed Note: This op-ed guest post by Justin Cleveland is in response to the porn star teacher scandal that made national news last week. Like many American kids, I grew up being told that I could be anything I wanted to be. Not only that, but I should get a well-rounded education, and with that […]

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7 Sexy Sins Fundraiser!

Sex Positive St. Louis is excited to introduce the next FUNdraiser: 7 Sexy Sins Wednesday, March 16 · 5:30pm – 9:00pm The Stable, Upstairs Loft 1821 Cherokee St. Saint Louis, MO Join us for a Sex+STL Happy Hour and art exhibit featuring the artwork of Drew Digital. Enjoy live DJ’s, nudes to draw, and new […]

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Interview With A Nudist

Meet JeepNaked, one of St. Louis’s best known nudists. You can meet him (and me!) in real life at Sex Positive St. Louis’ first ever Clothing Optional Tweetup April 5! Kendra Holliday: Would you consider yourself a nudist spokesperson for St Louis? JEEP: Nudist spokeperson?  Yes, in that I have a varied experience and overall […]

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On Barebacking by Lars Eighner

Back in August of 2010, writer Lars Eighner posted a couple of essays about (gay) bareback sex and (gay) bareback porn that I’d like to share. Thankfully, Eighner released the essays to the public domain, so I’m going to post them whole cloth over the next couple of weeks. The reason Eighner’s essays appeal to […]

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Meet Morpheous March 11-13 at The Facility!

Morpheous is a man of mystery. I’ve been curious about him for years, despite him slipping in and out of St. Louis several times, right under my ignorant nose. I FINALLY sniffed him out and nailed him down. I’m proud to say that I’ll be meeting him in the flesh very soon. You can, too, […]

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Brent’s Oral Exam: A Cute, Effective Safer Sex PSA

by Johnny Murdoc I’ve been thinking a lot about safer sex, lately, especially when it comes to the gay community. I’ve been especially torn between my role as a sex educator, and someone who strongly endorses safer sex practices, and my belief that people have the responsibility to make decisions for themselves and should have […]

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Tales of the City with the Queer Book Club

This is a guest post by Anita Fitzwater. UPDATE: The book club meeting has been moved from Shameless Grounds to Mokabe’s. Check below for the time, date, and new location! Who the hell am I? Well, I’m someone who’s been involved with the Bisexual Alliance of  St. Louis (BASL) for the past two years or so […]

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Join SEX+STL Tonight at Shameless Grounds and Naughti Gras 4!

There’s a lot of sexy goings-on this weekend here in Saint Louis, but one event stands out: Naughti Gras 4, Saint Louis’s largest erotic art show. Come out and see erotic art from dozens of great artists, including the work of SEX+STL’s own David Wraith, and SEX+STL friends Molly Algernon and Digital Drew! On top […]

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How I Became Sex-Positive

by The Reverend Who am I?  I am The Reverend.  The Skepdick.  I am married to a wonderful woman, we are polyamorous, we have kids and jobs and a wonderful life together and with our paramours. I am sex positive. I view respect and consideration to be at the core of all intimate interactions.  Coercion is […]

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SEX POSITIVE: A Documentary About the Birth of Safer Sex

I just finished watching Sex Positive, a documentary about Richard Berkowitz, who (along with singer and activist Michael Callen and physician Joseph Sonnabend) is largely responsible for the safer sex movement as we know it.   The film is probably most interesting because it’s complex. Berkowitz isn’t portrayed as a flawless hero and his fight […]

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The Vasectomy Dialogues: Justin’s Story

Justin (and yes, that his real name), is a local 30-something guy, who’s stays pretty involved in the polyamory and sexpositive communities.  If you come to one of our events, you just might see him around.  His openess about his experience  has provided a meaningful close to our three-part Vasectomy Dialogues series. Settling down with […]

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The Vasectomy Dialogues: Chatting with Michael

Recently, I was able to catch up with Michael and he was kind enough to be open about how he made the decision to get a vasectomy and his thoughts on the experience.  He’s 38, self-employed and living in St. Louis.  He got his vasectomy in Fall 2009 at Planned Parenthood’s North County location. Q:Would […]

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What Can You Say In America?

At the intersection of morality and commerce we impose our morals on financial decisions and use finances to justify moral decisions.

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The V-Dialogues: Beast’s Vasectomy Experience

In honor of V-day next week (that holiday on which we celebrate saints, love, vaginas, vas deferens, whatever), we’re featuring the stories of three local men who have made the decision to get a vasectomy.  They will share their experiences and reflections on having had the procedure and how that decision has affected their lives. […]

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Is PIV the New Oral?

by Anna In days of yore, when reproduction and male orgasm were the primary goals of heterosexual sex,  ‘the main event’ was the penis moving in and out of the vagina. Indeed, even today what most people mean when they say ‘sex’ is penetration (of a penis, into a vagina).  That’s problematic in so many […]

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Audio Erotica

As promised in my review of sexaudia.com, I’m returning to their selection of sexy audio story providers. At  Nobilis Erotica, you find a collection of  podcasts with stories that lean heavily in the direction of sci-fi and fantasy.  But that is where the commonalities stop.  The stories present all kinds of scenarios and run the […]

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Radical Participation or “There are No Fags There”

Ed note: This post originally appeared on the personal website of author and educator Lee Harrington: passionandsoul.com. It is re-posted here with his permission. Lee will be speaking at Washington University’s Sex Week. Bristol Palin sends her regrets. by Guest Blogger, Lee Harrington. I hear it time and time again.  That dungeon or event or play space has no […]

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Coffee Talk: Poly 101, February 13th at Mokabe’s

Are you thinking about opening your relationship? Are you poly curious? Are you new to the polyamorous lifestyle? Do you have questions about polyamory that you don’t know who to ask? Are you a poly veteran with wisdom to share? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then please join SEX+STL at Mokabe’s […]

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Sex and the Snowpocalypse

Most of Saint Louis is covered in what looks to be snow but is actually tiny ice pellets, with the weathermen promising vast amounts of snow later. All around the STL-based blogosphere, people are writing, Facebooking, and Tweeting about the oncoming Snowpocalypse (also: Snowmageddon, Icepocalypse, or—as the National Weather Center is warning—Blizzard) and SEX+STL is […]

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SEX+STL Goes to the RFT St. Louis Web Awards

SEX+STL attended the first ever Riverfront Times St. Louis Web Awards in honor of or nomination for Best Sex Blog and to support our category’s winner, SEX+STL co-founder Kendra Holliday of The Beautiful Kind. More pictures from the event here.

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Why I Am A Dominant Woman: Part 3 of 3

  This is part 3 of a 3 part series. Part 2 can be read here. by Guest Blogger, Mistress Simone Now to the reasons I am a dominant woman active in BDSM.I love men and women. I enjoy their reactions to the activities I administer upon them. The power exchange between active parties in a scene […]

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The Tantric Goddess Experience

Ed Note: This is a guest post by Lucia. I recently had the opportunity to attend a Tantra session with a Goddess in Kansas City. Yes, a Goddess. I’ve been studying Tantra – reading, searching the web, discussing and was finally ready to visit a Goddess in her temple. My interest began with an introduction […]

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Bad Boys of St. Louis

Bad Boys of St. Louis is an announcement list for local events for men who are interested in playing with other men. The list is organized by DJ, a South City resident, PHD student, and teacher. “I teach college to pay the bills,” he says. I first met DJ at a SEX+STL coffee talk just […]

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Normal Bodies?

by Anna During puberty, one of the big questions people ask themselves is: is my body normal?  That question often continues into adulthood.  That’s no surprise, especially in cultures that place a premium on ‘normal’ physicality and sexuality, but that represent only a narrow range of variation within this normality.  Add to that few natural […]

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Guess Who’s Coming to Beat Me!

by David Wraith For the uninitiated, Beat Me in St. Louis (commonly known as “Beat Me” or “BMSL”) is an annual BDSM convention now in its fourteenth year. Beat Me draws attendees, vendors and sex educators from across the country. Instructors teach the tricks of their trade during daytime classes, and guests can then try out […]

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Why I Am A Dominant Woman: Part 2 of 3

This is part 2 of a 3 part series. Part 1 can be read here. by Guest Blogger, Mistress Simone Along with BDSM as a sexual activity may come social activism, community awareness and political lobbying. These are all goals the original feminists strove for in the Suffrage movement. It was not  simply enough to obtain […]

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Sex Educator Tristan Taormino Uninvited to “Modern Sex” Conference

You know what’s ironic? When you get fired from your job for having a sex website, and then a sex blogger calendar with a “Sexual Freedom” theme kicks you off their calendar project for being “too controversial.” That happened to me last year. You know what else is ironic? When you’re a sex educator who […]

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Privacy & Discretion in the Sex-Positive Community

On January 9, we held a coffee talk meeting discussing privacy and discretion when it comes to navigating your way through all of the exciting outlets of the sex-positive community. We expected about a dozen to attend, but 25 showed up from all walks of life! Here is what we came up with: First of […]

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Shut Up and Love the Rain: A Personal Look at Being Queer

Way back in my introduction, I mentioned that I was a print fetishist. Few things excite me like a well-designed book, an exciting publishing experiment, or the results of an artist’s self-published endeavors. That last category is what I want to talk about today (and probably a lot in the future.) If you’re not familiar […]

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The Bi-deology Project

The Bi-deology Project came across my radar immediately after Christmas when I was decompressing from  a stressful family holiday by catching up on sex blog reading.  I found Twanna Hines’ column on non-black men dating black women and wove my way from link to link to the Bi-deology Project, a joint video project that she […]

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Why I Am A Dominant Woman: Part 1 of 3

  Hi, sexuals. A few weeks back, I did this interview with kink educator and pro-domme, Mistress Simone. For the next three weeks I will yield by blog on SEX+STL to the Mistress and her wisdom on the subject of being a feminist and  a fem-dom. Enjoy, and I’ll see you in February. – David […]

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Shameless Grounds Opening Late February!

Ready for some great local news? A wife and husband team are going into business for the good of the community. Here is Andy Mueller giving us the scoop! Kendra Holliday: What’s this I hear about a sex-positive community center coffee shop opening up in St. Louis? Andy Mueller: Yes, you heard right.  It’s called […]

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Greta Christina at Skepticon 3

A few months back, Kendra and I both attended Skepticon 3, a Springfield, MO convention dedicated to skepticism. I think that Kendra and I both agree that one of the best things about the convention itself (excluding anything that may have happened in hotel rooms in between speakers and platforms) was Greta Christina‘s talk, Atheism […]

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Vanilla Whipped up Right

by Anna One criticism of the sex positive movement is that along with setting up the norm that people should be having sex, and that sex should be relatively unproblematic, it also, in an effort to be ‘pro-kink’ tends to set up the expectation that everyone has some kind of fetish, or at least a […]

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Body Positive for the New Year

by David Wraith I need to get back in shape. I’m so out of shape that I almost take pride in saying that I need to get back in shape, because the strategic use of the word “back” presupposes that I actually was in shape at one point in my life, while remaining suitably vague […]

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Molly Algernon’s Sex Positive Project

By Kendra Holliday An interview with a local artist who has a vision. Will she succeed? That’s up to you! Donate to Molly’s Kickstarter project today! Kendra Holliday: Who are you? Where are you from? Molly Algernon: I am Molly Algernon, or some know me as Miss Omission. I’m Midwest born and raised, originally from […]

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Finding Peace at The Facility

by Johnny Murdoc In lieu of a blog post today, I’m going to direct you to an essay of mine that was published this week. It’s my account of SEX+STL’s first fundraiser, and I think it’s relevant to share here for a handful of reasons. The most important is that we have another fundraiser coming […]

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No, No, I Am Indeed Laughing at You

by Anna Karl: Not funny ‘ha-ha’, funny queer. Vaughan Cunningham: Well that’s a very offensive way to put it. You shouldn’t say that. You were taught that, weren’t you? -Slingblade (1996) One of the ways in which alternative sexual practices get marginalized is to make them the butt of jokes, to create the kind of […]

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Herpes Scare

By Kendra Holliday Via email, a friend of mine decided to tell me he had herpes two weeks AFTER I played with him. Due to the nature of our play (very little skin on skin contact, I even put a condom on my strapon), I wasn’t too concerned. Except for the bump I had down […]

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Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby: Part Two

by Johnny Murdoc In the last part, I wrote about primary method that my partner, Evan, and I used to facilitate discussions about sex, which involved regularly reading the weekly Savage Love column to one another. Reading about the real-world sexual issues of Love’s audience provided a great framework for discussing sexuality on a regular […]

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Bend Over and Say Hello to Mistress Simone

by David Wraith So, you saw the cover of Lee Harrington’s book Sacred Kink: The Eightfold Paths of BDSM and Beyond, and you asked yourself, who is that hot domme on the cover? Well, mystery solved: she is none other than nationally renowned kink educator, Mistress Simone. Mistress Simone divides her time between St. Louis […]

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Beethoven Made Me Cum

By Kendra Holliday In the spirit of Johnny Murdoc’s latest blog post, I’d like to joyfully share with you a hot masturbation session I had, featuring some really fun toys… I enjoyed a concert the other night. In bed. The instruments featured were the sleek Naughtibod, the OhMiBod, and the OhMibod Gspot. I got everything […]

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Right On, Taylor Momsen…

by Johnny Murdoc So, I know it’s somewhat irresponsible to take a break from posting the next installment of a series—especially when it’s only the second installment—but I wanted to share this quote. (Also, I may have not actually written the second installment, yet. I promise(!) it will come around next week, though.) However, I […]

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Internet Hasn’t Killed the Radio Star: Sexaudia.com

by Anna After reading Johnny Murdoc’s post, I found myself wishing that there was somewhere that I could find lots of great sexuality podcasts in one place.  Well, when I started surfing around sexaudia.com, my wish was granted.  Sexaudia is a sexuality-focused web radio station. This means that anytime you can ‘tune in’ and hear […]

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Where’s My Prostate? Or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Flood

by Anna One of the subjects that has been floating in the background of my sexual conciousness is female ejaculation.  I started ejaculating about four years ago, and it’s been puzzling and a little frustrating that I have so little control over when and how much I squirt. Bringing this to the fore was a […]

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That Poly Guy: Part 2, My Poly History

by David Wraith Hi, Sexuals. When people ask me how long I’ve been poly, I tell them nine years. This is technically true. I’m not even sure I knew the word “polyamory” before 2001. But the truth is, I’ve almost always been this way. When I was 11, I was introduced to “Rachel,” the resident […]

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A Very Kinky K.U.F.F. Christmas!

By Kendra Holliday Today we interview the leader of K.U.F.F.  about one of the kinkiest rockin’ holiday parties in town this season! The Beautiful Kind: What is K.U.F.F.? Kaos: K.U.F.F. (Kinky Under Forty Fetishists) is a new group for the St. Louis area for kinksters who are in the 18 – 40 age range.  We […]

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Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby: Part One

by Johnny Murdoc Whenever sex educators or advice columnists are confronted with problems between partners, their first recommendation is going to be communication. Recommending communication is easy because it’s true: there’s honestly nothing more crucial for correcting problems or making a change within a romantic or sexual relationships than communication. We all know that we […]

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That Poly Guy: Part 1

by David Wraith Happy Anniversary, a film starring you-know-who. Hi, Sexuals. The biggest surprise I’ve gotten in the brief period since Sex+STL got started is that I have received almost no questions about BDSM or nudism (two topics I know a bit about). Almost all the questions that have come to me personally, in person […]

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A Spanking Good Time

By Kendra Holliday Years ago I had a girlfriend who wanted a riding crop for Christmas, and I thought, “How weird!” I’ve been to more than one party that featured a flogger where I was just a voyeur, and it looked pretty intense. I wondered what people got out of spanking. I mean, I spent […]

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Department of Defense Releases Major Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Survey

by Johnny Murdoc Today should prove to be an important step forward for gay rights, as far as gays serving in the military is concerned. Just a short while ago, the U.S. Department of Defense released the findings of their thorough survey regarding the feelings of military personnel toward the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t […]

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Where do you draw your line? Is the grass better fertilized on the other side?

by Anna When people negotiate what they want to do in bed, or discuss what they like sexually, there’s usually talk about lines. There are lines that must not be crossed, lines ok for nudging and pushing and lines that move around with the time of the month. Some lines are just fences to keep anything […]

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Bend Over Boyfriends… We’ve Got You Pegged.

by David Wraith “Bend Over Boyfriend,” written and performed by Elva Maxine Beach My junior year in high school, a friend of mine came to me with great concern on her face. She’d heard something about me and wanted to know if it was true. She looked me in the eye and asked if I […]

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Sex Positive Podcasts

by Johnny Murdoc So. Today nearly conspired to keep me from blogging again, much like last Tuesday conspired to keep me from blogging last week. But I have persevered and you, dear readers, get to reap the rewards! Or, not, since this feels a little rushed. Hopefully, in the near future, I can get back […]

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“Sex at Dawn”: or Why I Prefer to Get It On at Sunset

By Anna SEX AT DAWN: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality (July 1, 2010, 384 pages; $25.99; ISBN 978-0-06-170780-3 Sex at Dawn has been a bit of a hit in the sex positive community due to dramatic support by sex advice guru Dan Savage. PoDGE discussed it last weekend at their monthly meeting, and as […]

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The Collection Blog Interview

An interview with the members of a new polyamorous blog based in St. Louis called The Collection! Meet Charlotte, Nora, The Reverend, The Rabbit, J, Darling Niki, and Pussy Pie… The Beautiful Kind: Well you all were a big hit at the SEX+STL happy hour, and PoDGE is praising you. We’re so glad you’re a […]

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EVENT: Coping With A Sex-Negative Environment

By Kendra Holliday Do you work, attend school, or live in a sex-negative environment? At this small coffee talk gathering at Meshuggah Cafe, 6269 Delmar Blvd , we will discuss ways to deal with complicated issues. Please join us. Sunday, November 14th, 3pm I’ve been fired from jobs, banned from activities, shunned and persecuted for […]

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The Frugal, Safe Licking (Sucking, Nibbling) of Holes

by Anna Note:   we at SEX+STL are not medical professionals.  We do, however, spend a fair amount of time engaging in responsible, critical research  in order to answer your questions as best as we can. Read and use your own best judgment. Question:  Dental dams – which works better: a cut-open glove or plastic wrap? […]

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Great Moments in St. Louis History: The Arousal Show

by David Wraith Watching Kendra and Beast’s scene from her Coming Out Party reminded me of the last time I really had my mind blown by a sex positive event in St. Louis. Ten years ago I was coming back from a trip to the west coast. I was lamenting being back in the conservative […]

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“Like a Rose in Bloom”

Anonymous feedback from one of the attendees of our first SEX+STL fundraiser (we raised $300!): I had a fantastic time at the SEX+STL fundraiser party.  I met and talked with many interesting people, and found a community where I feel I fully belong. Watching TBK’s scene was entrancing; I felt like I was watching a […]

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Sex Positive… MTV?

by Johnny Murdoc If you watch MTV these days, you can be forgiven for not realizing that the network was once on the vanguard of promoting safe and healthy sexuality. Shows like Jersey Shore do little to inspire the sex-positive conversation that we’d all like to see happen. During the 1990’s, when I was lucky […]

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Fat Phobia – Not Sexy, Not Positive

by Anna One incident during last weekend’s Porn Festival really made me think.  It happened while watching a few scenes from Tristan Taormino’s Rough Sex 2.   Great film. You should see it. Anyway, it was a midnight showing, and and several groups of  people wandered in late. One group of Germans sat down behind me […]

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SEX+STL Happy Hour Positively Successful!

By Kendra Holliday We had our first SEX+STL happy hour at Foam coffee shop Thursday night and I’m thrilled to let you know it was a huge success! Billed as a great way to meet like-minded people, thanks to the fine folks of St. Louis, the event lived up to that promise. It was amazing […]

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SEX+STL Happy Hour, Tonight at Foam!

  Don’t forget that tonight is SEX+STL’s Happy Hour at Foam Coffee & Beer! Come out and meet the founders of SEX+STL! Enjoy the coffee, beer, and eclectic aesthetics of Foam in the Cherokee neighborhood! This is our first public event and we would love to meet with everyone and talk about the future of […]

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Female Chauvinist Pigs

By Kendra Holliday When I first heard Ariel Levy, author of Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture, on NPR, I thought oh geez she wouldn’t like me much. She takes issue with women who run around wearing Playboy necklaces and going to strip clubs and posing nude as a way of […]

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ChoiceArt 2010: Raising Funds for a Good Cause

by Johnny Murdoc SEX+STL’s Friday night shindig isn’t the only fundraiser happening this week. On Saturday, FriendsbyChoice is hosting ChoiceArt 2010, an art auction to benefit Planned Parenthood. Planned Parenthood is an invaluable resource in the St. Louis area. They provide health services and education programs designed to give teens and adults the information they […]

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Friendly reminder: GET OUT AND VOTE!

Today is voting day. That means you should be out and voting if you’re legally and physically able to do so. If you need information regarding candidates and issues, check out The St. Louis Post-Dispatch’s Voter’s Guide. You can find your polling center at this website.

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Courtney Trouble at Berlin’s Porn Film Festival

Queer is as hard to define as it is to ignore. – Courtney Trouble Some NSFW images below – scroll carefully. While St. Louis has been my home for the last 5 years, I will be spending the next 9 months in a small town in north-central Germany. Recently I had the good great immense […]

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I Am NOT a Sex Addict – Part 2

by David Wraith Hi, sexuals. Last week, I made this post regarding accusations that I’m a sex addict. Now, let’s talk about the nature of addiction. While I believe that physical addictions are limited to things like alcohol and drugs, I do believe that one can be psychologically addicted to just about anything; food, shopping, […]

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SEX+STL Fundraiser!

Posted by Kendra Holliday, author of The Beautiful Kind PRIVATE, SCREENED FUNDRAISER FOR SEX+STL: Friday, November 5, 8pm-2am. $20 per person, cash only. TBK’s Coming Out Party. Proceeds to benefit Sex Positive St. Louis. 21 and up. Must show ID at the door. General social from 8-10pm.  At ten…the reason for the age limit begins. […]

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Sperm Wars

By Kendra Holliday Before Sex at Dawn, there was Sperm Wars. I’m reading this fascinating book about sperm by an evolutionary biologist named Robin Baker. Baker was interviewed on several radio stations when the book came out, and he was instructed to not use the word sperm in his interviews. More than once the interview […]

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Getting Turned On by Levi Johnston’s Blues

by Johnny Murdoc (Warning/annoucement: this post contains links to websites that should be considered unsafe for work or minors.) A few weeks ago Ben Folds released a new album called Lonely Avenue, created in collaboration with novelist Nick Hornby, who wrote all of the lyrics. All in all I’ve fallen in love with the album […]

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BC Recession-Style, Pt. 2

by Anna Note:  There are two brands of hormonal Emergency Contraception (EC) on the market now -Plan B (which was the only brand out, when I needed the stuff) and Ella (which was approved by the FDA in August 2010). I am using EC interchangeably with ‘Plan B’ because I’m more familiar with Plan B […]

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I Am NOT a Sex Addict – Part 1

by David Wraith I’m a big fan of Iranian American filmmaker Caveh Zahedi. He worked under the mainstream radar for years, making confessional documentaries for the film festival/ movie geek crowd (people like me). Then one night, to my great surprise, I turned on the radio and heard Caveh being interviewed on Loveline with Dr. […]

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Call for Models: The Masculinity Project

Attention St. Louis residents: Photographer Lane Goodman is seeking 12-20 subjects for his fascinating photo project that explores ideas of representation and masculinity. He’s also interested in non-traditional representations of masculinity, and representations of gender identity. In other larger, more liberal cities, photographers have no problem finding interested models for projects like this simply by […]

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SEX+STL Happy Hour @ Foam Coffee and Bar

SEX+STL is happy to announce our first public Happy Hour on Thursday, November 4th, 2010! Come out and meet three of the founders of SEX+STL (Unfortunately Anna, in her current role as foreign correspondent, will be unable to attend.) Enjoy the coffee, beer, and eclectic aesthetics of Foam in the Cherokee neighborhood! This is our […]

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“If you’re not out, you’re hurting us.”

by Johnny Murdoc The word “out,” when applied to a sexual minority, has a lot of implications and, honestly, a lot of layers. One of the most important things that I read years ago was that coming out isn’t just one thing that you do, it’s a series of steps that you will have to […]

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BC Recession-Style, Pt. 1

by Anna Disclaimer re: hormonal BC — I don’t use hormonal BC myself, and am frustrated by the fact that options that are less burdensome to finances, health and the environment don’t get nearly as much press as the latest version of ‘the Pill’. BUT most U.S. women use the Pill at some point in […]

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Westward Ho!

by David Wraith I know this site is called Sex Positive St. Louis, but on a site dedicated to sex positivity, I think it’s perfectly acceptable that we pay homage its American Mecca.  What Los Angeles is to the movie industry and New York is to the theater, San Francisco is to sex. Yes, L.A. […]

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What an Exciting Week!

By Kendra Holliday This week I came out. After writing semi-anonymously about sex for four years, I made the choice to finally put my name (KENDRA HOLLIDAY!) and face to my website. It was a decision I took seriously, especially since I am a single mom in the Midwest, but so far the response has […]

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Beate Uhse – Flying High

by Anna I had never been to a sex toy store before going to Germany for the first time about 9 years ago. To me sex toy stores were seedy places, with leering men lurking in dark corners. However, I had already bought my first vibrator –  a hot pink model, sold through Bust magazine’s […]

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Syncing Sexual Identities

by Johnny Murdoc One core problem that we at SEX+STL would like to address is the dissonance between our sex lives and the other factors that make up who we are. It’s no secret that American culture is incredibly uptight when it comes to sex (although not nearly as uptight as some other cultures) and […]

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For National Coming Out Day: Queer Heterosexuality and the Tyranny of Labels

by David Wraith Today is National Coming Out Day, so in the spirit of the occasion, I am going to come out. That’s right folks; this is a Sex Positive St. Louis exclusive. I, David Horatio Wraith, am a heterosexual. Whew! There, I said it. I feel like a weight has been lifted. Done and […]

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What is Vanilla Sex?

By Kendra Holliday I’m all about vanilla sex. It’s the foundation of sexuality. My short list for what constitutes modern day vanilla sex (keep in mind that 40 years ago, oral sex was considered “unclean”) contains the following examples: cuddling, kissing, massage, standard sex positions, passionate lovemaking, oral pleasure, watching porn, monogamy, mutual masturbation, basic […]

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It Gets Better…

by Johnny Murdoc All week long I’ve had these ideas about all of the sexy blog posts that I was going to write for the SEX+STL blog. Now, it’s down to the wire and all I can think about is kind of a bummer topic, but it’s an important one. My buddy Rob Wolfsham, a […]

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Where to Find Us Online

So, now that you’ve met the four founders of Sex Positive St. Louis, I wanted to tell you a little bit more about how you can find us online. Building a community is a huge part of what SEX+STL would like to achieve, and one of our first steps is building that community on the […]

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Anna’s Grand Narrative

Hi! It’s me, Anna, 29, bisexual and mostly polyamorous. College years in Memphis were spent escorting at Planned Parenthood, working on various projects with the Womens Action Coalition, the university’s LGBT group and, later, anti-war activism. When grad school took over my life, I started keeping things fun with community gardening , beer brewing (read: […]

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Johnny Murdoc Writes an Introduction to Himself

Hello! I’m Johnny Murdoc, a 29-year-old sex writer and co-founder of Sex Positive St. Louis. This year I’ve had a gay erotic science fiction comic published, self-published two ‘zines collecting my dirty stories, and had a story selected for the upcoming Best Gay Erotica 2011. I’ve also written regular essays for SexIs, on topics ranging […]

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The Evolution of David Wraith

Hi sexuals, I’m David Wraith. This is my story and I’m sticking to it. My first official act as a high school graduate was to use some of my graduation money to buy tickets to see Lollapalooza. Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Ice Cube and the Red Hot Chili Peppers were playing that year. On the way […]

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Meet The Beautiful Kind

By Kendra Holliday Hello! I am The Beautiful Kind, aka TBK, and am one of the four founders of Sex Positive St. Louis. You can learn more about me by visiting my quick ‘n dirty bio here. This summer, my friend Anna contacted me about forming a sex positive organization along the lines of Whole […]

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Ducky Doolittle Interview on Sex Is Fun

Ducky Doolittle is a fairly new name to me. A sex educator based in Minneapolis, she speaks all over the country and has a fabulous series of videos on YouTube. Of her many projects, my favorite is ‘love u parties’ – a business that uses a direct-sales model (think Avon or Tupperware) to get high-quality […]

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