2011: The SEX+STL Year in Review

The SEX+STL Justice League at our secret base inside Shameless Grounds.

by David Wraith

SEX+STL has been around just over a year and 2011 has been our first full calendar year of existence. Not to break our arms patting ourselves on the back, but I think we’ve accomplished a lot for a young, unlanded organization with no money, just some really dedicated people and a town that was obviously ready for what we have to offer.  And now, a look back…


In January we put on “Law & Disorder,” a play party and fundraiser for Kendra Holliday’s legal defense fund. It was a legal themed costume party, so people came dressed as their favorite law enforcement figures or outlaws.  The room was filled with cops, cowboys, prostitutes and serial killers. Our costume contest winner was dressed as the decoy girl from “To Catch a Predator.”

Kendra Holliday as Aileen Wournos and David Wraith as The Honorable Judge Wendell T. Motherfucker at Law & Disorder. Photo by Mike Estes.

That month we also hosted a Coffee Talk on Privacy at Mokabe’s and held our first Happy Hour at HandleBar.


In February we tabled at our new favorite place, Shameless Grounds during Naughti Gras at the Koken Art Factory.

We also hosted a Coffee Talk at Mokabe’s called Polyamory 101, with guest facilitators Rebecca and Woof.  Fun Fact: Polyamory 101 was the day after Kendra Holliday’s “Wild Love Party” at the new Facility. I hadn’t planned to stay at the party long, since I had prep for Poly 101 left to do. When I realized that I would be at Wild Love very late, I ended up in the Facility’s dungeon, naked on a couch, sending emails and taking care of last minute Poly 101 business with my smart phone. 


The Facility hosted Pandamonium, weekend long BDSM event headlined by writer, photographer and rope rigger, Morpheous. In lieu of our normal Coffee Talk, SEX+STL hosted a reading and signing of Morpheous’ latest book, “How to be Kinky.”

There's more to being kinky than you realize.

That same month was also our first ever party at The Stable: 7 Sexy Sins, thrown by our new event coordinator, Drew Digital.

Drew Digital poses with his work at 7 Sexy Sins. Photo by Crystal Rolfe.


In April we held our first ever Clothing Optional Meet Up (then still called a Tweet Up), Our Coffee Talk was a tour of Shameless Grounds, which was also the sight of our Temptations Sex Toy Party and our Sex Positive Parenting Luncheon, facilitated by none other than Susie Bright.

Susie Bright and Charlotte Times at the Sex Positive Parenting Luncheon.

Susie Bright and Charlotte Times at the Sex Positive Parenting Luncheon.


May was a busy month. We had our second Clothing Optional Meet Up, our second party at The Stable, How Hedonistic, a Coffee Talk on Body Image, led by Charlotte Times and the official launch of our Sex Positive Parenting Group. Oh yeah, and Kendra shaved her head.

Greer and Kendra sporting togas at How Hedonistic. Photo by Crystal Rolfe.


In June we represented! We represented at the Pride Parade in our new SEX+STL T-Shirts, and we represented at The World Naked Bike Ride in a lot less!

Rocking the fashionable and functional SEX+STL T-Shirts at the Pride Parade.

The reigning Mr. Missouri Leather, DJ Kaiser, led our Coffee Talk on Labels. Johnny Murdoc and I each appeared on Kendra’s short-lived I Watch Radio show, which gave way to the new and improved The Beautiful Kind Podcast. And did we have another party at The Stable? Oh yeah, the Black & White party.

Maxine Beach, author of "Neurotica," reading at Black White. Photo by Crystal Rolfe.


July was all about SlutWalk STL! Somehow, we also managed to have a Clothing Optional Meet Up/Pool Party that month, as well as a Trivia Night /Happy Hour at HandleBar and a Coffee Talk called “The Ghost of Relationships Past” led by Charlotte Times. The lovely ladies of Literary Nudes also threw a fundraiser for us. All I had to do for that was show up, look at naked people for a couple hours and then take the money. Nice work if you can get it.

One of my favorite "protest signs" from SlutWalk STL.


In August we held our first porn watching party, “The Friday Film Fetish,” (a movie called “Bat-Man XXX” was the fan favorite) at The Stable.  The porn was provided by our friends at Spankys. Johnny led a Coffee Talk on Monogamy (that was attended by mostly poly folks).  We co-sponsored a reading by Lauren Rosewarne, author of “Part-Time Perverts,” at Subterranean Books.  And we hosted a Happy Hour at HandleBar, headlined by magazine publisher, Bella Bazooka.

Bella Bazooka, Kendra and Drew at HandelBar.

And most importantly, our founder, Anna Bent returned from Germany. The time that Anna was overseas was for SEX+STL, like the period when Joey Fatone injured his leg and Wade Robeson had to take his place in *NSync .


A rare slow month for us, but we did manage to host Sex Positive Etiquette for Men and a Clothing Optional Meet Up/Sock Party.

Surrounded by sock-positive people!


In October we ventured out of the city to hold our first Happy Hour in West County at Hot Shots Sports Bar and Grill. Alas, the Cardinals made it into the post season and most folks were more interested in baseball than sex that night.

We also held a screening of the documentary “Asexuality: The Making of a Movement,” in honor of Asexual Awareness Week and we launched the SEX+STL Book Club.

Also, Anna represented at The Ethical Society’s Responsible Public Debate. The topic was “Is There a Sacred Dimension to Sexuality?”  Her opponent was conservative Christian author, Matthew Anderson. Good times!


In November we held our first purely literary event, Sex Positive St. Louis Out Loud, at Shameless Grounds.

Shameless Grounds was also the site of our impromptu Meet and Greet for Buck Angel, who was in town as part of Washington University’s Transgender Awareness Week.

Andy and Michelle of Shameless Grounds with Buck Angel

We also held our first Coffee Talk at The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Center of St. Louis. The topic was Erotic Photography Tips and to those who attended, I’m still awaiting samples of your homework.


In December we gave a very well received presentation on SEX+STL, who we are and what we do, at The Ethical Society and we also got some great press in The Riverfront Times for our Clothing Optional Meet Up, “Fleshtivus,” thanks to RFT blog editor, Chad Garrison.

Wow! What a year. I’m exhausted just from typing out this list!


  1. I am so glad and proud to be involved in such a incredible organization such as SEX+STL! And the best part about it: I learned a lot about myself and my own sexuality just be being involved. And everything I learned was all VERY good too! Here’s to a Sex Positive 2012–thanks Kendra, David, Johnny, Anna and everyone! And Happy New Year to you all!

  2. This has been a great year. I am so glad to have gotten involved with this group. It has been an eye and mind opening experience. I am SO looking forward to next year.

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